How public speaking coaches can change your life. Oh, and how our guest met Freddy Krueger!
Can a public speaking coach change your life? We're about to find out!
One two Freddy’s coming for you. Three four, better… become a public speaking coach….(??)
That was as weird as one of the Freddy’s hell nightmares. So let’s get shot of that, and instead focus on (Sean) Tyler Foley’s insights on becoming a better public speaker.
After listening to or reading this episode you’ll know exactly what you need to do to become a much better public speaker.
We’re making conversations about public speaking count, with Tyler Foley – Episode 95!
Quiet now please! The presentation is about to begin!
Who is (Sean) Tyler Foley (Freddy vs Jason) and what is the power to speak naked?
Sean Tyler Foley had a small but memorable role in the movie Freddy vs Jason.
He played the character of ‘male counselor’ and was in a key scene in which he actually becomes Freddy Krueger.
Sean Tyler Foley’s opportunity was given to him in a very unplanned way.
He tells the story in the chat with Wendy.
How does this relate to an article about public speaking coaches?
Well, like with every professional who becomes excellent at what they do, it forms part of the journey.
And Tyler’s scrape with a fictional nightmare demon might not be the conventional way that public speaking coaches get their break, but it’s the way he chose.
And why not?!
Scroll down to continue reading this episode in which Tyler Foley shares the truthful answer to the question; how can public speaking coaches change your life?
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Using decades of knowledge and experience, Wendy can help you get the results you want, quickly.
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What Tyler does now!
Sean Tyler Foley is a published author, keynote speaker, international business advisor and one of the world’s best public speaking coaches who helps his clients share their message with confidence.
He has worked with clients around the globe and has the experience and expertise to help you to plan, create, and produce exceptional speaking content.
Whether you want to share your ideas with the world on the main stage or share your vision with potential investors, Sean Tyler Foley can help by becoming your public speaking coach.
The Power To Speak Naked is his book which covers the ability to be vulnerable and transparent in your message.
It’s about being real and sharing your authentic self.
When you are able to do this, you create a connection with your audience that is unbreakable.
And when you have that connection, you can influence them in a way that is powerful and long -lasting.
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Everyone says you need to sell the benefits. And with public speaking, that’s even more true!
Most people think that in order to sell their product or service, they need to focus on the benefits and features. However, the reality is that you need to focus on the solution.
When you focus on the solution, you are able to connect with your audience on a deeper level.
You are able to show them how your product or service can solve their problem or meet their needs.
In this chat, Sean Tyler Foley goes deep, helping us to understand that with public speaking you’re absolutely still selling the benefits. But to yourself.
“And I know for me, I’ve spoken on stage to tens of thousands of people. I’ve performed to auditoriums of thousands of people.
I have in my band played to an outdoor venue that was almost hundreds of thousands of people.
I think that when we played our venue there was 90,000 people.
And like that everybody looks at me and goes, well, aren’t you scared?
I’m like, well, at that point, no, I wasn’t scared of that.
But let me tell you something that does terrify me…”
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Tyler’s favourite family trip and the importance of his daughter
In this episode we get a real glimpse behind the beaded curtain of the one of the world’s best public speaking coaches to understand how he thinks, and what led to him becoming who he is.
In this case, a lot of Sean Tyler Foley’s spirit comes from his relationship with his daughter.
He explains how he’s had to manage his knowledge of his industry and wanting his daughter to follow in his footsteps in the film industry.
And with the auditions already starting….
Mannerisms? Hmmmmmm
This is where we get into the science of public speaking.
Have you ever noticed your own mannerisms?
We all have them.
And they can all have an impact on how we’re perceived and received whenever we’re doing public speaking.
As Sean Tyler Foley puts it, “We all have that one thing.”
And that one thing makes the difference between whether we feel like we’ve done a good job or a bad job.
Listen as Tyler talks about some famous people who have entertained audiences and how they did so.
And how you can take lessons from those, and apply it to your own public speaking.
Read the full transcript here.
This episode of “Making Conversations Count”, in which Tyler Foley explains the benefits of working with public speaking coaches covers:
Freddy vs Jason (1m13s)
What Tyler does now (4m10s)
Everyone says you need to sell the benefits. It’s actually more about selling the solution! (8m30s)
Tyler’s favourite family trip (13m39s)
Mannerisms. Hmmmm… (26m10s)
Tyler’s conversation that counted (39m50s)
Wendy’s takeaway
Tyler lost his Dad at 6 years old and I don’t mean he misplaced him, he died.
Tyler also suffered a personal medical incident (not dissimilar to Justin Beiber) leaving his facial muscles paralysed ending his childhood stardom.
Now it’s no surprise that Tyler dotes on his daughter, Kenzie and draws comparisons.
This was a wildly entertaining conversation and we even got to hear some tips on public speaking and body language (and it would be wrong not to, since that’s his day job now!)
Tyler’s Links
Please do let us know your take-aways from this episode by leaving a comment at https;//makingconversations.studio/Review-Tyler-Foley
New to this site? Learn more about Making Conversations Count podcast:
“Making Conversations Count” is a podcast from WAG Associates founder and telemarketing trainer Wendy Harris.
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Dynamic read-along transcript
Fancy repeating the experience of making conversations count? Here's another chance to hear a popular previous conversation - on a similar theme to the one you just heard.
Fancy repeating the experience of making conversations count? Here's another chance to hear a popular previous conversation - on a similar theme to the one you just heard.
https://makingconversationscount.com/public-speaking-coaches-can-change-your-life/
https://makingconversationscount.com/silence-in-sales-calls/
https://makingconversationscount.com/emotional-support-for-business-owners/
https://makingconversationscount.com/be-bold-and-confident/
https://makingconversationscount.com/overcome-imposter-syndrome-unsquash-yourself/
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Spoiler alert: want to read the conversation that counted in this episode about selling on Amazon with Lesley Hensell?
You like to ruin the plot twist huh? OK, not judging. Here you are.
I want to know the conversation that counted for you, Tyler.
I’ve had so many, but when you said it, the first one that popped to mind was the conversation I had with my doctor, mentor and father figure growing up, Dr. Bob Corbett. I had a medical incident when I was 17 that left the left side of my body paralyzed. And I distinctly remember about a month and a half afterwards being in his office crying because my face didn’t work, my body didn’t work. My acting career was over, and being so frustrated with Western medicine. Here we are in the 21st century, and they can’t diagnose what happened to me. Was it a stroke? Was it a bell’s policy? Was it a mini stroke? Why did somebody say I had oh… I can’t even remember. It just seemed so bizarre and it didn’t even sound like a thing that could happen. A full body. I don’t even remember. Anyway. Nobody could tell me what it was. And Bob sat me down. He said, Think of the blessing that is. I said, how is not knowing what the hell happened to me a blessing, sir? And he went, if you had a diagnosis, there would be one course of treatment which may or may not work. You had a stroke. There’s nothing we can do. But we don’t know what you had. So now we have the freedom to try anything. And if you can try, anything could work. In fact, everything could work. So let’s start trying things and see what works. And then he quoted Edison. Edison didn’t find a thousand ways not to make a light bulb right until he found the one that did. Bob has been a steady oarsman for me in my life, and what I appreciate the most about him, he really is an oarsman. He allows me to captain my ship. What’s the course that we want to set, Captain? But he will be steady at the hand. If I tell him where due west. He will say, Very well, due west. He’ll look at me and he says, you understand that looks like it could very possibly be bad weather. I’ll say, yes. He goes, okay, let’s weather this storm, then. We’ll batten down the hatches. And I will keep this boat due west. And I have always been in great admiration of him and I’ve tried to pattern and emulate him as best I can in that he was one of the first people to teach me to like, I don’t believe in finding the positive in life.
Is that if it’s just never big enough?
It’s not even that. What it is, is that my father passed away at six. I don’t think that was a positive. I’m not going to be like, hey, dad died. Good for that. No, there’s not a positive. But what I do look for is the grace in situations. There is grace in everything. My father passing away created an opportunity for me to have multiple father figures in my life, at least ten, Bob being one of them. My medical incident gave me a chance to reframe and refocus what was important to me. Really crystallize friendships, because I had incredible friend support when that happened. And in high school, that’s rare too, right? I was a freak. I had a face that didn’t work. The worst that my friends did was they’d make me laugh because I made this sound because I couldn’t close my mouth. And it was comical. I don’t blame them. It was irritating sometimes, but that was the worst that I got. How dare my friends try to make me laugh in a time of great tragedy for me.
That’s what friends do.
That is what friends do. I have always looked for the grace and a lot of that came from the lessons that I learned from Bob and continually learned from Bob. He’s struggling currently medically, and I’m watching what he’s going through and again, how he’s handling it with grace because it’s got to be so frustrating for him and to witness his partial acceptance, but also pushing of experimentation, like, what is the solution? I think that’s the thing that I like the most about him too. And one of the things that I learned is there’s a problem? What is the solution and how can I be proactive with it? And that first conversation, 17 years old in his office, isn’t this a gift? And having him look at now you have multiple solutions instead of one has influenced me for the rest of my life.
What did work?
I don’t know which one. It was the kitchen sink. It was the kitchen sink that did it.
Good.
Bob is a doctor of chiropractic. His wife Joanne is a doctor of chiropractic who is a holistic practitioner. She’s also an acupuncturist. So like with Jo, I was doing laser acupuncture, chiropractic and Eastern herbs and medicines. With Bob. I was doing chiropractic. They recommended me to an incredible physiotherapist. So I was doing physio. I was also taking modern medications to encourage synaptic regrowth and get neurons firing again, I did so much, and for a year I was scanned, prodded, poked and all kinds of weird stuff. And I don’t know what worked, but it all kind of blended together. And did my face works now? My body works now.
You’ve got quite a fine face, I have to say.
Why, thank you, Wendy.
When you revealed how old you were, I was like, what?
I drink a lot of water and I moisturize. And I have a six year old daughter who keeps me spry and youthful. And I play hockey three times a week as a goaltender, so I’m never off the ice. So I get in my physical workouts and it keeps my mind sharp, I think. I hope.
But they do say, don’t they, that your physical health has a really big impact on everything else. So clearly it’s working for you. Well, I’m just glad for Dr. Bob and it’s just so heartwarming that you’re still in touch with him all these years later. I don’t know anybody that has got a doctor that stuck around that long.
Well, it’s funny because, again, I’ve been in touch with a lot of these gentlemen who helped guide me in my early years. Not as often as I’d like to, but I still talked to my physician, Dr. Spackman. I played in a band with his son for a couple of years, Dr. Bob and I.. I took him when I was made master of my lodge. Bob, he was the first person I reached out to and asked him to be at the ceremony. He influenced my life so much that not only do I feel the need to pay it forward, because a lot of the lessons that I teach from stage are things that I’ve learned from him, but I also feel an obligation to pay back. Like, I wouldn’t have the life that I have. He was the first one to introduce me to self development. He bought me a ticket to Dr. John Demartini’s breakthrough experience, and I didn’t understand how profound that would be until later. And I didn’t fully appreciate what kind of a gift that was until later in life. But that’s the kind of man that he was. He was like, this is the thing I’m going to invest in you. This is a thing that was important for me, that I think will be important for you, and that’s put me on a path. Right. I wouldn’t have had the opportunity to speak on Tony Robin stage in Dallas if it were not for that seed that was planted over 20 years ago. And we never know.
You took the words right out of my mouth.
Trained public speaker here.
(Laughs)
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You’ll read about:
You’ll hear:
Blaine and his TEDx Talk (1m02s)
Chief Results Officer? (3m47s)
Observations of business owners and entrepreneurs who struggle with results (12m19s)
Change doesn’t happen quickly enough but stick at it because it’s worth it! (23m25s)
Blaines’s conversation that counts (30m13s)
Blaine and his TEDx Talk (1m02s)
We all have these little idiosyncrasies that we like to hang on to... 21 seconds... an hour. If I was to say to my daughter, you've got all day to tie to your bedroom, guess what? It takes her all day to tidy her bedroom. So it's got to be the same in business. If you tell me I've only got 20 minutes to do something, I'll get it done with spare time!
Yes. Everything from when people argue for the limitations they get to keep them, to it's the lens that you look through that actually creates your life. So I call it the lens of the future, but that is so key. And then finding practical ways to program the subconscious mind to help you. Right. I did a TEDx Talk where I asked people to change the unlock screen on their phone. And so now, for years, I've been getting great feedback from people saying that made a big difference in their life. So whatever you're trying to bring about, you put that on your unlock screen. You can also have your family stuff, and then you can make a customized image. But many people have nothing. They have, like, the default unlock screen, which is interesting, but you see that screen, you unlock your phone 60 to 150 times a day. So it's a real strong way to keep putting what you want to bring about, what you think about what you bring about. It's a way to program that subconscious, but it's super powerful, and you're so right. That how you see it creates the reality. And if people get that, that's a big breakthrough.
Confession time. I did the unlock screen on my phone, and it was a picture of myself in actual fact, when I felt that I looked the best, I was slimmer, no Covid pounds. And it has been working because initially I was looking at it and thinking, this is I really don't like this. But it has had an impact. It's changed with what I eat, the what I drink, the getting up and moving more. So I'd say to anybody, just give it a try!
Yeah. Agreed. A lot of this stuff is self evident. Just try it for a little while. And you may not see it consciously, but your subconscious mind is still seeing it. And maybe you change it. Maybe you turn it to the side or you add some words to it. You can also kind of mix it up. I like to mix mine up every couple of weeks, but it's having the same core thing on there,
Chief Results Officer? (3m47s)
No, it is interesting. So what got you to become the chief Results officer then, Blaine?
So, for me, there were two moments of dawning comprehension where the world changes almost on a single thought. And for me, the first one came in college. I went to Purdue University in West Lafayette, Indiana, and I've always been kind of maybe like you and the listeners. I've been a little bit of a seeker, a seeker of knowledge. How can I do better? What could I do better? And so I saw this ad for an audio cassette tape. So I'm kind of dating myself. This was back in the 80s, but when I went to college and I sent away for this audio cassette, which was an abridged version of "Think and Grow Rich", it was actually this guy Earl Nightingale reading "Think and Grow Rich". And I got that audio tape, and then I subsequently purchased the book, and I realised there that "Think and Grow Rich". Now, the book is about Think and Grow Rich, but the riches can be anything. It could be financial, he talks about that, but it could be harmonious relationships, your health. And that's where this concept of what you think about you bring about. That was where I first got that. And I realized, now, wait a second, I'm in a lot more control than I realized. And I had a lot of success because of that initial reading of that book. And actually, I met my wife. We've been married 30 years, so I met her.
Congratulations.
Yes. That was kind of the first thing that started me on the journey there and started kind of taking control of myself a little bit more. But then the big change, the big dawning comprehension moment number two. I came back from a business trip, my degree's in computer science, I was working as a software engineer, and I came back from this long business trip, and my son Beau, he was one year old, and he was, like, giving me the cold shoulder when I came back. And I said, hey, Beth, what's going on? What's wrong with Beau here? And she said, well, you were gone so long, he kind of forgot who you were. And I was like, what? I mean, that hit me emotionally pretty hard at night. And I realized when I was a kid, I'd come home to an empty house. Both my parents worked. And so that night I had this moment of dawning comprehension, and I made a clarifying decision. Now, when you make a clarifying decision, it kind of like, cuts out a lot of other decisions, cuts out a lot of noise and really focuses you almost like a laser on one thing. And that decision was that I was going to be a work from home dad. And so it took me a year. It took me a year to get there because we were kind of conservative and wanted to save up enough money and have living expenses in the bank. But anyway, a year later, my wife said, if you can make more on your side hustle thing, whatever you're doing here from home, and you make more money at that than you do from the job or even the same, then you can go, you can cut away the job. So I did that. So it took me a year, but I did that and I left my job. And that was 27 years ago. And so for the last 27 years, I've been working from home, running businesses that really have no daily operations. So I've been able to do a lot of self development and that's what led me on the course to become the Chief Results Officer. I started helping people. I created a company called Selfluence, which is really kind of the art and science of influencing yourself. But more than that, it's the power that you already have to influence yourself. You don't need any special software, you don't have to buy anything else. You have it all kind of within you. And I started helping a lot of mastermind groups and they said, hey, you're helping us get results every week. We're going to call you the Chief Results Officer. I'm like. Oh, I like that. So I like the title. I took the title and then I went to the US Patent Office and I registered the title. So now I can say I'm America's only Chief Results officer. But anyway, I've been doing that and I think that's why I'm here. I think God has me on the planet to help people take control of their lives by taking control of themselves. So that's what I've been doing. Now, pretty much 27 years from home, kids are out of the nest now, so I have a lot more time to serve clients than I did before, but I really do enjoy it.
What a benefit for Beau, really? And gosh, we say this so often on this show is that there are things that you can do that can help and aid us, but ultimately it comes back to self. It doesn't matter. So you're saying that you decided to do something. Reminds me of Rob Begg who's a past guest as well. He's also a mindset expert and he says if you decide, you've also got to commit and that's effectively what you've done. So there's a lot of entrepreneurs out there that I think they decide that they're going to work for themselves, but they don't commit. Do you see that it goes hand in hand?
I do. And I think there's a third component, and that is the action right there. There's a famous joke. Three birds are sitting on a tree, one decides to fly off. How many birds are left? And the audience typically says two, but no three. One made a decision, but they didn't fly off, they didn't take the action right. So I think what you think about, you bring about that. It's a combination of you make the decision right, and then you need to commit to that decision, but your commitment shows up in action. And so it's the action steps you take that kind of determine if it's real or not. And I will say that many decisions and desires kind of die on the vine because they're not strong enough for that person. And you can tell they're not strong enough if they don't want to wake up early, stay up late, and really put the action behind it. Right? And that's where you see the people really begin to move forward, because it's even taking the action. Even if you're going in the wrong direction, at least you're moving. They say you can't steer a parked car. You got to be moving. You got to take action. And it's in the action that really you kind of learn more about it, and then it can either grow, or you might realize that you're heading in the wrong direction. But that's okay, because it's in the knowing of where you're going. That's the fun part. And I like to tell people, you can't change your destination overnight, but you can change your direction. So if you figure out where you want to go, you can point in that direction and then start to move there. But in turning and facing, like, whatever it is you really want in life, you're going to feel the energy chemically. You're going to get excited about it, you're going to feel it.
It's a bit like stepping out into the sunshine, isn't it, and feeling it on your face. It is that much of an impact. But that's great course correction, isn't it? If we have these navigation systems built in, we are also tied to the magnetic force. So why do you think we have moved away so far from what comes naturally to us? Blaine, what's your take on that?
When you can get back to these core things? It feels good, it feels right. But today, more so than any time in the history of the world, is that there are so many distractions, and the level of distractions are so high. And everybody that I know has one of these, which is a smartphone, a cell phone. And so that can be like the greatest tool of productivity or the most evil distraction machine known to man or woman. For me, it's the level of distractions number one, and the loss of think time. That would probably be number two. Of time where you are... it's almost like more shower time, where there's no phones, there's no electronics, there's no outside world. People need more of that. I tell them, your phone has airplane mode. That's not just for airplanes. You can use it during the week, too. But I think lack of Think Time and distractions are the two things that pull you away, maybe even from who you are, who you want to be, your self development. So switching, that is possible, right? So switching, removing distractions. Right. So my family isn't super happy about it, but I've removed all the rings. Dings and dings. My phone never rings. If I'm expecting a call, maybe I'll look for that. But typically, I never answer the phone, and I've really cut down the distractions, number one. And then number two is I put a lot of think time back into my day and into my life and I think that makes a big difference.
Observations of business owners and entrepreneurs who struggle with results (12m19s)
What's your observation then, Blaine, of working with entrepreneurs and business owners that are struggling with that productivity and getting the results that they need? What's the first place that you sort of get them to be doing something slightly different?
I serve primarily business owners and the number one problem is overwhelm. Too many things to do and they're typically a day behind or more than a day behind things. And so what I like to do is first of all, show them that there is something to go after and I call it a day ahead. And so I like to take entrepreneurs from being a day behind to just being behind to being caught up, to being ahead to being a day ahead. And there is this thing, I call it the day ahead lifestyle which I live most days now, not every day, but most days I'm a day ahead. So when I wake up there may be some appointments like this podcast, but all the to-do's are done. Like I have no to-do's for the day and I'm working on tomorrow's to-do's. And so this concept of moving into that just first of all know that it's possible to be a day ahead. And my wife is back in school now getting a master's degree and she likes to be a week or two weeks ahead on homework and other things so you can get there. But the first thing is you've got to handle the overwhelm. And so typically what I see that works the best is to do some kind of a mind dump of all these things that you have to do. Now if you just do a mind dump alone, you're going to be more overwhelmed but guide them through. So get out a piece of paper and start to write down what are all the things that are top of mind. They're swimming around, oh, I've got to do this for this client or I got to do that. I've got these appointments, I've got to do this with the products, whatever it is. You have all these things swimming around and write all those things down and spend at least 15 minutes doing that and then take maybe a five minute break and then come back, maybe go a little bit deeper. Also, sometimes I provide a lot of prompts, a lot of questions to kind of pull more and more stuff out of your head and get it on paper. So the last time I did that in a big way, I ended up with 453 items on my list.
Wow!
Super overwhelming. Look out. Yikes. But the key is that you must immediately process the list. So it's in the immediate processing of the list that the overwhelm begins to subside. Because what I mean by processing the list is that you put an end next to things you can do now, something that takes less than five minutes. If it's a bigger project, I also say, look, why don't you write to the right of it? What's the next step on that? It might just be scheduled meeting with so and so, send somebody an email, something that's quick and fast. But you write an N next to those things that you can do now, and then you write an S next to things that need to be scheduled. They need to be done in the next, let's say, a week or so. And then D is next to things that you can delegate, you can give to someone else. Not that you're going to do it, but you could do it. It's possible to delegate. And then L, which should be the most used letter of all, stands for later. And those are things that are not pressing, let's say, in this week. Now, sometimes people do it just for the day. Like, what am I going to do today? Some people might do it for a month or a quarter. But one of those things that you can let go a little bit, you can put on the later list. And most of the time, like out of my 400, I don't know, probably 300, something of those were later items. But they're out of my head now and they're on paper. And then what happens is then you go after you take maybe 30 minutes and do a bunch of the Ns, get a little... start winning the battle of the brain chemicals, get the dopamine going, the serotonin, you're getting stuff done, you're moving forward. Then the bigger ones, you schedule those into your calendar, maybe you see what the next small step is again, win early, win often. And that starts to get them out of the overwhelm and get them into kind of high value, productive action. That's one thing I do. The other thing is that all entrepreneurs and business owners, most people, want to compress time. And so I do have a framework called the 30 Minutes Hour. It's how to get an hour's worth of stuff done in just 30 minutes. So sometimes I walk them through that framework as well, because if they can compress time, they're winning.
Yeah, there's a lot about what you've said there that comes back to feeling in control of the situation, isn't it? And thinking is just energy, isn't it? You've got all these thoughts and they're just randomly popping in and out of your attention span... by putting them down on paper makes perfect sense because you can look and it not take up your attention of worrying about it because you've already decided how you're going to do something with it. Is it next? Is it later? Is it a big thing? But it frees your energy up to be laser focused on the tasks that you really do need to do. And there's just that feeling of striking off things off your list, isn't there? That satisfaction of done that, done that... the fact that you've gotten to the end of a list is an achievement itself. But getting into the habit of doing that on a daily basis, that's got to be where the results are coming from.
Yes, you're exactly right about those open loops and all that thing that's swimming around in your head that you have to keep remembering, right? And when you get rid of those things now you've got some more room, some more capacity and you even feel better, like you said. And then also you're right about the checking off the list. A lot of times I'll ask business owners, have you ever done something and it's not on your list but you write it on your list so you could check it off? We've all kind of done that. But that gives us the dopamine that like physically shows up. You get a little square of dopamine in your brain and it feels good. Your body, your mind, it wants you to get stuff done, right? So it rewards that. So you are right. And a lot of it is how you think and what you think about you bring about and how you think makes all the difference and actually changes your reality. I call it the lens of the future. But how you say or say to yourself or how you think the prediction of the future is going to go, that is what you're going to end up creating, right? So the story I like to tell about that is let's say that I say, Wendy, look, I'm sorry but today is going to be one of the worst days of your life. And so then you go out and you're like, I don't know if Blaine's right or not. And then you're almost hit by a car and you say, wow, look, Blaine was right. I was almost hit by the car and you're shaking and you're like, oh my, what else is going to happen? And physically, brain chemical wise and physically, you get scared and you kind of get small and you're worried about the rest of the day right? Now if the same morning I said to you, Wendy, today is going to be one of the best days of your life. You're looking through a different lens but the same thing happens. You're almost hit by the car and you go, well Blaine was right. I was saved. Like, why was I saved? God still has something for me to do on this planet. I'm still here. And then you're exuberant. Now there's a little fear from the accident almost happening but right out of that you come up and you're not down, you're up. And the brain chemicals and your physiology is all like, this is a great day, what else is going to happen? Great. And so the same circumstances happened, but you created the reality based on the lens that you're looking through, and that is some of the biggest brain science and discoveries that are happening now is that you create that world based on that lens. So have you found that to be true in your...
Yeah, all the time. For me it comes down to language and it can be habitual. It's conditioned what we pick up from other people. You know that saying of who you surround yourself with, if that's negative, then that brings you down. I'm a positive kind of person in the main and it's hard if you're the only positive person sort of bringing the negative people up as well. So yeah, for me it's an energy thing. Everything is around energy and if you use the wrong language, it's like saying, oh, I nearly got hit by a car, but Blaine said it was a good day. You go, my luck was in and yet, it's got absolutely nothing to do with that. So it reminds me a little bit of the Matrix movie series that literally you can design the life that you want. How badly do you want it?
Yeah, agreed. And you're right about the people you hang around with. And I'm all for helping people, but I don't like maybe a third of the time I can be around people that are, let's say, at a lower frequency and have issues and I want to help them. And then a third of the time I like to be around people kind of my own energy level. And then another third of the time though, I want that higher energy. Right. I want to be kind of like you said, moving up and it can be tough. The other thing is if you're stuck in that lower energy or in that I call it head trash...
It's a good term.
Yeah, everybody has head trash. Now, my head trash, because I do a lot of things, is small and it's in the corner, but it's still there. And actually I do this thing called a mind shower every morning to kind of take the head trash out. But I like to tell people who are stuck with a lot of head trash that the solution to pollution is dilution. So if you ever see like if there's a liquid, a dark liquid in a beaker, the more clear water they add, it'll get less and less and less and less and soon it will be clear. What I find is the ratio is different for everybody. Like I need maybe a five to one ratio. So if I have 1 hour around negative people and bad things, I need 5 hours of positive. I got to pour in the positive to dilute down that negative. But realize that it is a bit of a battle, but like you said, what are you pouring in? Who are the people you around? What are you listening to? What are you watching? What foods are you eating? That all has energy and vibration, too. So you can really pour in so much of the higher vibration stuff that it does begin to minimize and kind of there's this little point where it'll flip over and you'll feel like you're in control of those thoughts rather than those thoughts and that negativity being in charge of you.
Change doesn’t happen quickly enough but stick at it because it’s worth it! (23m25s)
And you're right, really. That energy, the dark water into the clear, that's like recharging a battery, isn't it? When you need to go and find some positive to sort of just, you know... and I would say that people give up too soon. You can be adding clear water in and adding positivity into that dark water. And it could just be that you're just frustrated that the change is not happening quick enough. Please just stick at it because it's worth it.
Yeah, it is worth it. And realize that there's some people that will pour the dark ink back in the water, right? So you have to start to guard the inputs of your life, guard the inputs of your brain and your body. Because sometimes people don't even mean to do it. It's unconscious to them, but they are negative towards you or low energy.. so yeah keep pouring the positive and keep pouring it in big doses. I remember my favorite mentor is this guy Jim Rohn... I don't know if you remember...
Yeah, I know Jim Rohn.
Yeah, he's my favorite guy. I got to meet him and host him at an event one time and for him, he had this series, it's called The Power of Ambition, which I listened to on audio cassettes. Again, back to the dating myself. But I listened to that program 50 times in a row because I was at a point in my life where that's what I needed and I could finish the sentences of that program, but that's what I needed. That's what I needed to really get through some tough times. I mentioned before that I broke free from my job. But if you realize at that point we had a one year old son, I had a 50 hours week job and I started two other businesses at the same time. I mean, my marriage almost didn't make it through that year. So now we made it through that year and many others. But there are times where you got to lean into something, leaning into a mentor or whatever that positive thing is for you. But today there's so much available online and through things like Audible.com and podcasts like this, I mean, fantastic stuff that you can be pouring in that positive on a constant basis and you can do it at the same time as doing something else, right? You're driving in the car, pour in the positive. You're exercising poor in the positive, doing household chores pouring the positive. My wife and I were cleaning this weekend, and I was listening to a book on tape and just pouring in the positive.
Yeah, no, Neal, the producer, he'll be laughing at this now because he basically says, Wendy, in your world, there is no room for excuses. And there isn't really, because I understand that people can get into a position or a situation and not realize that they've gotten there, but there is always something that you can do to get yourself out of that. There are no excuses.
I like to say, when I lost my excuses, I found my results. That's a little quote I like to say. And you're right. And the other thing people need to be clear on is it's all about you compared to you, not you compared to other people. Now, if you want to change your happiness, you can compare yourself. Right. So if my ego is getting too big, then my wife can say, well, how much money does Oprah make every year? Okay? Yeah. I'm very small. But the opposite is also true, is if I'm feeling down, my wife can say, how many of your friends have no job and the freedom that you have. Right. In that comparison, you can regulate your happiness, but for your results, it is best to compare you to you. Right. Let's just better your best. And for me, this definition of success is kind of you moving towards your goal, whatever that is. So it's very personal, whatever that personal goal is. And if you find yourself in this situation, you can begin to move out of that situation and celebrate just maybe those first steps out of that situation. Right, so you're comparing yourself to you. So, yes, you can change direction overnight, and then you can begin to make measurable progress in a reasonable amount of time as compared to where you are. Right. And so, yeah, I think that's a valid point on happiness. And then also, no excuses for you getting better. Now you're human, so you're going to have bad days. That's right. But you just want to ride again, get back on the horse, ride again, and ride a little bit better. Figure out some way that you can ride a little bit better. So you go a little bit longer and you get a little bit closer to where you want to be and who you want to be.
And like you said at the very beginning, Blaine, growing rich and success is not necessarily about numbers in a bank balance. It can be how you want to live and who you want to live that with. Your reasons why.
Yes. Maslow's hierarchy of needs is there. I mean, you need a certain amount of money for food and shelter and those things, and if you're struggling there, then there's a lot of help. Right? I mean, the Internet, podcasts like this, books like Think and Grow Rich, there's a lot of resources there. But you have to take the step like you have to have the desire and then, as we said earlier, make the decision, commit to the decision, but then take some action behind that decision. Right. And when you feed the decision with action, then you're going to find out, is this really something good for me or not? And most people find that it is. And then they start moving forward. And then it's funny that when you start moving forward, it's kind of a little slow and slogging in the beginning, but as you get out of the mud and you get out of that and you start to go faster and faster and faster, typically then things start to move really fast. That's exciting as I see that in people when they adopt, say, a new habit and then all of a sudden now everything else in their life is kind of taking off.
It is just about making that start. If you make the start, you're already ahead of where you were.
Yes.
Blaines’s conversation that counts (30m13s)
It seems only right, really, at this juncture, to ask you about a conversation that created a turning point for you. I've got a feeling that it may link to what you were talking about with your career change and things like that, but you might surprise me because of course I never know what's coming next.
That's exciting.
So what was that one conversation that changed your life either for business or for personal?
It started as a conversation and changed my life. And that was actually Jim Rohn. And so Jim Rohn, a friend of mine, introduced me to Jim Rohn and then I was able to actually host him at an event I was running. And I got lucky because he had a house in the Phoenix area and this event was in Phoenix and he happened to be there. So it was very easy for him to come to this event. And so he came to that event and I got to hear him and share the stage with him. But the things that he said that evening had a big impact on me. Right. And one of the things he says is it's not what happens that determines your life future, it's what you do about what happens. And that was the beginning of kind of the lens conversation as well. But he said that, so it's not what happens that determines your life future, it's what you do about what happens. And I realized in that moment, I realized that I didn't have to worry about circumstances, the economy, the pandemics, and all these different things that's going to happen to everybody actually. But it's my response to what happens that determines the outcome of my life and my businesses. And then he went on to say the other thing he said that night was don't wish it was easier, wish you were better. And I was like, Whoa, that was big. Don't wish for less problems, wish for more wisdom. And he just got me to switch it to see that praying and begging for things to be better or easier, that was just going to fix the thing one time. If I increased my wisdom and I got better, that's going to increase everything for the rest of my life. And so that started me on a nice trajectory. But it was that conversation that night with Jim Rohn that I think led me to this course of becoming the Chief Results Officer. Now, having the time to do that with my son. Having the inputs was the "Think and Grow Rich" book. But it was that conversation that night. He also said, profits are better than wages. And I was like, oh, poof, I've got to do more of my own business. So that was it.
Wow. I know, previous guest Brad Sugars, he was influenced by Jim in a big way, and he talked about that on the show as well. Isn't it interesting, because we've already kind of touched on this, that just by switching your language out just changes the end results of what you want to be creating.
Agreed. And a couple of years ago, I read this one book called The One Thing by a guy named Keller, and in there he said and some people say different ways he says, when you argue for your limitations, you get to keep them. It was just that language right there. That's where I realized, now, wait a second, let me say that again. Let me hear that for real. When you argue for your limitations, you get to keep them. And so what happened is that was the trigger for me kind of processing my own language, right? So if I start to say, I'm too old, I'm too this, I'm too that, I can't this, I can't that, won't all that almost negative kind of self talk. And it was on big things and small things, I realized it was almost like the predefeated mind, I'm never going to try that thing, because I've just accepted that limitation. And then I started hearing that language in other people, and now I can't go anywhere without hearing people arguing for their limitations all the time. But it's gotten so good in our family or in some businesses, masterminds that I work with, they'll say, oh, now Blaine is going to say you're arguing for your limitations there. But that consciousness around what you say is so big, and that can be kind of that pivotal point in your life, is when you start to listen to and process that self talk. That's big.
Yeah. Awareness. Self awareness. It can be a real driving force... or not. Well, thank goodness for Jim Rohn. Honestly. Thank you, Blaine, for sharing your story and so many different productivity hacks that we can apply to our own business and go away. I'm going to just go and sort out my mind trash later. I got to do another dump.
And I will say, look... on the head trash. The thing that has helped me the most and my clients is really that concept of the mind shower. Meaning like most people take a physical shower every day, but how often do you take a Mind Shower where you kind of wash out your mind and take out the head trash? Now there's apps. I use an app called Headspace, kind of a meditation breathing app, but I do that every single day. And I've done that now because the app tracks like 1500 days in a row. I've done this Mind Shower, just a little thing like that. Now I like a ten minute Mind Shower, but if I don't have time, I'll do a three minute Mind Shower. But doing that, I do that first thing in the morning, every morning. And that's made a big difference because I feel like at the beginning of the day, I'm kind of taking control of my mind showering it out, cleaning it out a little bit, but then also getting that lens ready for the day to make the most from the day.
Yes, it fits with your computer science background as well. It's almost like you're defragging the system and every day just hit reset. And then that head trash writing everything down in such a big overwhelm. It's not going to be that big anymore, is it? Because you've already got a handle on it, right?
Agreed.
I've had an absolute blast. I know who to reach out to now when I need either some head trash or a Mind Shower. Thank you.
I have thoroughly enjoyed this and I just want to take a moment to thank you. This is not easy to put all this stuff together and put it online and you have a big results ripple, queen of conversations here. You have a big results ripple and I will bet that you are touching lives not yet born that somebody 20 or 30 years from now is going to find this stuff and it's going to make a difference. So I want to congratulate you on that and leave you with this. That the bad news. The bad news is time flies. The good news, you're the pilot. So pilot well.
Thank you. I've got to go and cry now.
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TL;dr - want the episode summarised in one paragraph, and in your own language? Here is it.
ENGLISH: “Humans are basically big batteries. We have electromagnetic pulses running through us. That’s how our body actually stays alive. When those electrical pulses stop, so does everything else, because the electrical pulses are what runs your brain in your heart. So when the electricity in your body stops, when your battery gets drained, that’s when the body stops working. And anybody who’s done any kind of 10th grade physics knows that if you run an electrical current through something, there is an electromagnetic wave that comes from that. That’s how half of modern science measures. The body is through EKGs and your Cat scans and all the rest of it. All they’re looking at is electrical pulses through your various organs. And if you have this electrical field around you, it’s just a magnetic field, but like anything, you have electrons then that are moving through the air in front of you, and you have electrons that are moving through the air behind you. And you are literally affecting your environment beyond your actual physicality. And what you do with that and the energy that you’re putting out, because you’re literally putting out energy, is what is going to be felt. And so you got to remember, you are leading with energy just as much as you’re leaving energy behind..”
ARABIC:
البشر هم في الأساس بطاريات كبيرة. لدينا نبضات كهرومغناطيسية تمر من خلالنا. هذه هي الطريقة التي يبقى بها جسمنا على قيد الحياة. عندما تتوقف هذه النبضات الكهربائية ، يتوقف كل شيء ، لأن النبضات الكهربائية هي التي تدير دماغك في قلبك. لذلك عندما تتوقف الكهرباء في جسمك ، وعندما تنفد البطارية ، يتوقف الجسم عن العمل. وأي شخص قام بأي نوع من الفيزياء للصف العاشر يعرف أنه إذا قمت بتشغيل تيار كهربائي عبر شيء ما ، فهناك موجة كهرومغناطيسية تأتي من ذلك. هذه هي الطريقة التي يقيسها نصف العلم الحديث. يمر الجسم عبر مخطط كهربية القلب (EKGs) وفحص Cat وكل ما تبقى منه. كل ما يبحثون عنه هو نبضات كهربائية عبر أعضائك المختلفة. وإذا كان لديك هذا المجال الكهربائي من حولك ، فهو مجرد مجال مغناطيسي ، ولكن مثل أي شيء ، لديك إلكترونات تتحرك في الهواء أمامك ، ولديك إلكترونات تتحرك في الهواء خلفك. وأنت حرفيًا تؤثر على بيئتك بما يتجاوز جسدك الفعلي. وما تفعله بذلك وبالطاقة التي تبددها ، لأنك حرفيًا تفرغ الطاقة ، هو ما ستشعر به. وعليك أن تتذكر ، فأنت تقود بقوة بقدر ما تترك الطاقة وراءك.
كنت تبيع عنصرًا في فئة الحيوانات الأليفة ، فما نوع الترخيص الذي يمكنك وضعه على ذلك؟ أو إذا كانت في فئة الملابس ، فما نوع الترخيص الذي يمكنك الحصول عليه لذلك؟ يمكنك الحصول على اسم علامة تجارية مشهور ويمكنك الدفع لهم وسيسمحون لك بوضع شعارهم على العنصر الخاص بك إذا كان عنصرًا ذا صلة. واو ، فجأة تهيمن على فئة حيث كنت ستصبح مجرد بائع آخر. هناك الكثير من الفرص لذلك أيضًا. وأنا أعلم أن هذا لا يبدو محليًا ، لكنه لا يزال التصنيع المحلي الخاص بك. لقد استخدمت للتو اسم العلامة التجارية لشخص ما لتضعك في المقدمة في نتائج البحث والأشخاص الراغبين في شراء العنصر.
SPANISH: “Los humanos son básicamente grandes baterías. Tenemos pulsos electromagnéticos corriendo a través de nosotros. Así es como nuestro cuerpo realmente se mantiene vivo. Cuando esos pulsos eléctricos se detienen, también lo hace todo lo demás, porque los pulsos eléctricos son lo que hace funcionar tu cerebro en tu corazón. Entonces, cuando la electricidad en su cuerpo se detiene, cuando su batería se agota, es cuando el cuerpo deja de funcionar. Y cualquiera que haya hecho algún tipo de física de grado 10 sabe que si pasa una corriente eléctrica a través de algo, hay una onda electromagnética que proviene de eso. Así es como mide la mitad de la ciencia moderna. El cuerpo está a través de electrocardiogramas y tomografías computarizadas y todo lo demás. Todo lo que están viendo son pulsos eléctricos a través de sus diversos órganos. Y si tienes este campo eléctrico a tu alrededor, es solo un campo magnético, pero como todo, tienes electrones que se mueven por el aire frente a ti, y tienes electrones que se mueven por el aire detrás de ti. Y literalmente estás afectando tu entorno más allá de tu físico real. Y lo que haces con eso y la energía que estás emitiendo, porque literalmente estás emitiendo energía, es lo que se va a sentir. Y, por lo tanto, debe recordar que está liderando con energía tanto como está dejando energía atrás.“.
FRENCH: “Les humains sont essentiellement de grosses batteries. Nous avons des impulsions électromagnétiques qui nous traversent. C’est ainsi que notre corps reste en vie. Lorsque ces impulsions électriques s’arrêtent, tout le reste s’arrête, car les impulsions électriques sont ce qui fait fonctionner votre cerveau dans votre cœur. Ainsi, lorsque l’électricité dans votre corps s’arrête, lorsque votre batterie se vide, c’est à ce moment-là que le corps cesse de fonctionner. Et quiconque a fait n’importe quel type de physique de 10e année sait que si vous faites passer un courant électrique à travers quelque chose, il y a une onde électromagnétique qui en provient. C’est ainsi que mesure la moitié de la science moderne. Le corps passe par des électrocardiogrammes et vos scans de chat et tout le reste. Tout ce qu’ils regardent, ce sont des impulsions électriques à travers vos différents organes. Et si vous avez ce champ électrique autour de vous, c’est juste un champ magnétique, mais comme n’importe quoi, vous avez alors des électrons qui se déplacent dans l’air devant vous, et vous avez des électrons qui se déplacent dans l’air derrière vous. Et vous affectez littéralement votre environnement au-delà de votre physique réelle. Et ce que vous faites avec cela et l’énergie que vous dégagez, parce que vous dégagez littéralement de l’énergie, c’est ce qui va être ressenti. Et donc vous devez vous rappeler que vous dirigez avec autant d’énergie que vous laissez de l’énergie derrière vous..“
GERMAN: “Menschen sind im Grunde große Batterien. Wir werden von elektromagnetischen Impulsen durchzogen. So bleibt unser Körper tatsächlich am Leben. Wenn diese elektrischen Impulse aufhören, hört auch alles andere auf, denn die elektrischen Impulse sind das, was Ihr Gehirn in Ihrem Herzen antreibt. Wenn also die Elektrizität in Ihrem Körper aufhört, wenn Ihre Batterie leer ist, hört der Körper auf zu arbeiten. Und jeder, der irgendeine Art von Physik in der 10. Klasse gemacht hat, weiß, dass, wenn man einen elektrischen Strom durch etwas leitet, daraus eine elektromagnetische Welle entsteht. So misst die Hälfte der modernen Wissenschaft. Der Körper ist durch EKGs und Ihre Katzenscans und den ganzen Rest davon. Alles, was sie sehen, sind elektrische Impulse durch Ihre verschiedenen Organe. Und wenn Sie dieses elektrische Feld um sich herum haben, ist es nur ein magnetisches Feld, aber wie bei allem haben Sie Elektronen, die sich vor Ihnen durch die Luft bewegen, und Sie haben Elektronen, die sich hinter Ihnen durch die Luft bewegen. Und Sie beeinflussen buchstäblich Ihre Umgebung über Ihre tatsächliche Körperlichkeit hinaus. Und was ihr damit macht und die Energie, die ihr aussendet, weil ihr buchstäblich Energie aussendet, wird gefühlt werden. Und so müssen Sie sich daran erinnern, dass Sie genauso mit Energie führen, wie Sie Energie zurücklassen.”
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