The secret to overcoming the agony of self-sabotage from the man now offering legendary emotional support for business owners

Do you need some Legendary emotional support as a business owner?

Are you self-sabotaging and getting in your own way? Do you need the level of emotional support that’s fit for business owners?

 

After listening to or reading this episode you’ll hopefully be more aware of the tools you need to avoid self-sabotage and head towards success!

 

We’re making conversations about legendary support count, with Tommy Breedlove – Episode 89!

 

Tommy shares his story, and insights – and it’s not one million miles away from being another “Wolf of Wall Street” movie…!

 

 

Michal and Ana Bohanes talk about client acquisitions system

Big take-away quote from this conversation about emotional support for business owners – Tommy Breedlove:

“When I started working on my inner game, my mental game, my emotional, my spiritual game, in three years, I went from a junior partner in the firm, to a senior partner, to an owner, to running the international practice.

And my income doubled.”

Tommy Breedlove, Making Conversations Count – (June 2022)

(Hard of hearing? Transcript here).

Strapped for data? You can hear a lower-bandwidth version of the episode here.) 

Who is Tommy Breedlove? And why are we focusing on him as an expert in emotional support for business owners?

Tommy Breedlove is the author of “Legendary”, a self-help book that details his own journey from self-sabotage to success.

After doing jail time for a violent crime, Tommy was able to turn his life around and achieve huge financial and personal success.

He offers emotional support for business owners who are struggling with self-sabotage.

Tommy’s message is simple: self-sabotage is the number one enemy of success.

But self-sabotage is not a life-sentence, and you can take steps to ensure it won’t destroy your chances of achieving your goals.

Fortunately, there are ways to overcome self-sabotage.

Self-sabotage often comes from a place of fear.

The theme of this episode suggests that recognising that your self-sabotaging behaviour is motivated by fear, and taking steps to check in with yourself can help with overcoming that self-sabotaging.

And that is part of his mission to help increase the level of emotional support for business owners so they can feel more confident and empowered.

Scroll down to continue reading this episode in which Tommy talks about how he’s campaigning for a world filled with readily accessible emotional support for business owners!

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Pain and humble beginnings – the Tommy Breedlove origin story

Tommy Breedlove’s story started with pain.

He was born into violence and poverty, and he spent his formative years teetering on the edge of self-destruction.

As a teenager, Tommy committed a brutal crime, and he was sent to prison for seven years. He didn’t serve the seven years.

He managed to apply himself and was able to turn his life around by getting decent honest work which ultimately led to a total transformation.

He’s now passing on the learning he gained from his journey, and helping share his wisdom as part of his mission to offer emotional support for business owners.

 

How much money do podcasts make - Travis' own podcast

It’s ok to prioritise your business!

Most business owners feel guilty about prioritising their business. They feel like they’re supposed to be able to balance their business and home life perfectly, and when they can’t, they feel like they’re failing.

Again, this is part of what Tommy Breedlove is trying to correct with his efforts to share emotional support for business owners.

The truth is, it’s ok to prioritise your business. In fact, it’s essential if you want your business to succeed.

When you’re first starting out, your business will require most of your attention.

You’ll need to put in long hours and make sacrifices in other areas of your life.

And that’s ok! Your business is your baby, and it deserves your time and attention.

It’s just you. And you need emotional support, but unless you’re paying for it, emotional support is not always available to business owners.

Once you’ve established your business and it’s running smoothly, you can start to focus on other areas of your life. But in the beginning, don’t feel guilty about putting your business first. It’s essential for its success.

Here’s what Tommy has to say about it in the episode.

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Quote from episode – click here for full transcript

“And for me, no matter what, if you’re a business owner, you’re going to prioritise your business because you carry a profit burden, you carry the burden of employees. You want to be successful, you’re doing it. You employ people, you want to make an impact. There’s all these great reasons, and I love business owners, but let’s just own that we prioritise the business. But you can. It’s about quality over quantity. The quality of time you spend with your spouse, the quality of time that you spend with your friends, the quality of time you spend with your children if you have them, and all being rowing in the same direction. Because relationships are hard. Family is hard, business is hard, life is hard. And so when you bring people together and you teach them to communicate or you bring them together to teach them how to be courageous and self confident and how to love themselves. So to me, my whole goal, and maybe it’s your goal too, is shift the paradigm.”

Watch the episode promo!

Managed to catch the previous episode yet? Click play on the player below to listen!

Advice for entrepreneurs who are starting out!

As business owners we’re subjected to so-called experts who want to have us part with our money in return for advice. But how do you know the advice is valid and worthy of following?

In this episode, Wendy asks him for his advice for entrepreneurs who are starting out. Here’s that excerpt taken from the transcript.

(Quote from episode. Read the full transcript here).

“The number one failure in life and leadership is knowing thyself.

It’s self awareness. Don’t give up. If you show up every day for yourself, we show up, we honor our commitments and we do what we’re going to say we’re going to do.

If you do that, I’m telling you you will be 99% ahead of almost all other entrepreneurs. So I’d say lead yourself first.

Work on your emotional game, your mental game and your spiritual game and your physical game every single day so that you could show up for your business.”

Schitts Creek self-sabotage gif

In the UK and US we’re surrounded by noise

Tommy makes the point that there’s a lot of distraction we’re subjected to in the Western world, particularly in the UK and the US.

(Quote from episode. Read the full transcript here).

“They want us to get angry, they want us to get upset, they want us to blame somebody, they want us to feel like victims. And then you turn on social media and everybody’s LinkedIn, successful or Instagram, fabulous. And it’s just noise. It’s just noise. And how do we overcome that. First of all, turn it off and surround yourself with positive people who make you happy and make you better.”

You’ll learn….

This episode of “Making Conversations Count”, in which Tommy Breedlove shares his secret of overcoming self-sabotage, and how he’s now offering insight into legendary emotional support for business owners, covers:

  • Pain and humble beginnings: the legendary origin story!
  • Prioritise your business
  • Tommy’s advice for entrepreneurs starting out
  • Tommy’s conversation that counted 

 

Wendy’s takeaway

In this week’s episode, we’re treated to Tommy Breedlove’s true openness and self-reflection (he’s the self proclaimed “Picasso” at screwing up!) and his tips for feeling some of that vital emotional support for business owners.

He shares his secret of overcoming self-sabotage.

Tommy has had a tough past, including jail time for a violent crime, but has since turned his life around, and his story is very inspirational.

I’m hoping a lot of listeners to the podcast and readers of the written for reading transcript will get a lot out of Tommy’s truth.

Tommy’s Links

Please do let us know your take-aways from this episode by leaving a comment at https;//makingconversations.studio/Review-Tommy-Breedlove

New to this site? Learn more about Making Conversations Count podcast:

“Making Conversations Count” is a podcast from WAG Associates founder and telemarketing trainer Wendy Harris.

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Spoiler alert: want to read the conversation that counted in this episode about emotional support for business owners with Tommy Breedlove?…

You like to ruin the plot twist huh? OK, not judging. Here you are.

Wendy

Tommy, I don’t know if you know this, but every guest, I ask the one question, which is what’s the one conversation that you can recall and share with us today that you know, if you hadn’t have had your life, would not be as it is today.

 

Tommy Breedlove

I think the conversation with my wife when I was 36 years old, I think she loved me when I couldn’t love me. And just to let her know my fears, my insecurities, my mistakes, how I had been living X amount of years, I went to the seven day retreat just to figure out who I was. And I fully expected her not to be there when I got back. But I was open, I was honest. I said whatever she wanted because we were too successful. Business success, life, terrible business success. Whatever she wanted, I said, you can have. Take it, whatever you want, just leave me a pair of pants and I’ll rebuild. And when I got back, she was here and she never left. And she stood there like a graceful oak tree. I love oak trees, by the way, and all her grace and all her beauty. And that conversation, we’ve had tough conversations. I’m not saying we’ve got it all figured out as a couple, but she’s my chief of staff, she’s my chairman of the board, she’s my rock, and she gives me class. And I think that conversation, there’s no way I would be the man, the human, the person, the seeker, the grower that I am today without unconditional support of her. And I can say honestly today, even over the last rough couple of years, we’re better today than we’ve ever been. So that’s the conversation.

 

Wendy

See, this is kind of why I’m moved to do the kind of retreat that I want to do, is because it is tough to work through business and life. So give your wife a big hug and a kiss from Wendywoo tonight, will you, please?

 

Tommy Breedlove

I will. We’re going to grill together tonight. We haven’t cooked together in a long time, so we’re going to grill tonight. I’m looking at my grill, by the way, so I’m excited.

 

Wendy

Well, I can tell those coals are going to get hot.

 

Tommy Breedlove

I love it.

 

Wendy

So what’s next for Tommy, then? I know that empowering people and business owners is kind of your thing. What’s next? What do we expect?

 

Tommy Breedlove

I’m going to slow down to speed up. We’ve got some big strategic things happening. We’re starting our women’s movement. I’m so excited about that. I think the women’s movement is a blue ocean. Our dream is 1 million men and 1 million women’s lives transformed to be more successful in life, more successful in business, more successful in relationships, more successful in their mindset. And so we have big goals, but I can’t do it alone. So we’re building the legendary life movement and we’re in the experience coaching and retreat business. And I can’t do it alone because Tommy Breedlove has got a limited life and that’s a gift, right? We’re only here so many days. We don’t know how long that is.

 

Wendy

We’ve got to experience it as well. Yeah.

 

Tommy Breedlove

So we’re actively right now building the movement and not Tommy as a brand. So think more people were looking for a CEO. I mean, two days I’ve just spent in the North Georgia mountains, which are beautiful, by the way, for you people in the UK. We have some beautiful mountains here into the south. But I just spent two days with a guy that’s potentially going to be our CEO. This afternoon, I’m talking to another guy who’s going to partner with us and it’s taken me two years to find these people. It’s got to be the right person. We don’t negotiate our core values. We absolutely do not. But we have been very intentional about partnering with people to help us expand our reach. And we want to build this legendary life. We want people to be with us for life. We don’t want it to be a one and done. We don’t want it to come in, like a lot of people in my business, you go to their event, you come out. We want you to live with us forever.

 

Wendy

This is like the family that you can choose to have Thanksgiving with. Yeah, that’s got to be way cooler, because when most of my family get in touch. I run for the hills.

 

Tommy Breedlove

Ugh when they start talking about politics and I just melt. They’re blaming this person or that person, you know, I hate using this word. The pandemic shined a lot of light on a lot of people.

 

Wendy

Fantastic for me.

 

Tommy Breedlove

It’s fantastic for me, too. And how we showed up in the world and how we showed up for each other and how we showed up in our lives, compared to what I saw some of my other friends and family do, it’s just unbelievable.

 

Wendy

Yeah, they’re calling it, aren’t they, the Great Migration and all of that kind of thing. Actually, I just think it was just a fabulous reboot.

 

Tommy Breedlove

It was a reset.

 

Wendy

Yeah.

 

Tommy Breedlove

And for those of us who chose to see the light, I think it also shined a light on we’re going to be okay. No matter what, we’re going to be okay.

 

Wendy

Yeah, I think so. We’ve got some extraordinary people that can really make the difference. It’s just about knowing where to look, isn’t it? Follow the light.

 

Tommy Breedlove

What we’ve got coming up in the short term is we’ve got two men’s retreats coming up in the beautiful North Georgia mountains and one woman’s retreat. That’s what we’ve got coming up. And I’m just super excited and pumped up that these people show up with courage and they want to lead themselves so they can lead others. So I’m super fired up about it.

 

Wendy

You are an absolute diamond. Honestly. Keep doing all that you’re doing because it suits you, sir.

 

Tommy Breedlove

Finally living up to my last name, which is a real last name, by the way. Got it. Breedlove. I’m finally living up to my last name.

 

Wendy

I think you’re right. We always encourage listeners to carry on the conversation with guests, so we’ll be sticking a load of stuff on the show notes and I’ll probably have to tap Lindsay up for something special for the listeners. But if they want to reach out from listening because we’re impulsive people like that, what’s the best place for them to find you?

 

Tommy Breedlove

You can find me at tommybreedlove.com. All you need to know about our retreats, our experiences, our masterminds, our community is there. If you want to reach out to us directly, I’m going to give you two emails. Lindsay@tommybreadlove.com or Tommy@tommybreadlove.com, just reach out to us directly. We’ll get back to you.

 

Wendy

There’s a pattern there.

 

Tommy Breedlove

Check out the book. It’s everywhere. It’s at your favourite bookstore. It’s at the airports if you’re flying. If you don’t read, I will read it to you. You can get it on Audible so I can read it to you. What I would recommend people doing is go there because it is just chock full of simple things to help you be more successful in your life and your mindset, your relationships and in business. It’s not my wisdom, it was wisdom that was shown to me, but it’s executable to go there as well. So reach out to us at Tommy@tommybreaklove.com. On social we’re everywhere. We put out goodness. We don’t put out any darkness. Or just check out the book. I think the reason the book has been so successful is because it’s fun, it’s quick, it’s easy, but most importantly, it’s not theory, it’s actionable. And so check us out there.

 

Wendy

Well, Tommy, thank you for Making Conversations about being legendary.Count with me today.

 

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Tommy Breedlove – lower bandwidth

So there you have it!

When it comes to emotional support for business owners, Tommy’s book presents something of a solution.

Click this box to read the full Episode Transcript - Conversation around how can a public speaking coach change your life? - "Making Conversations Count"

How can public speaking coaches change your life episode artwork

You’ll hear:

 

Freddy vs Jason (1m13s)

What Tyler does now (4m10s)

Everyone says you need to sell the benefits. It's actually more about selling the solution! (8m30s)

Tyler's favourite family trip (13m39s)

Mannerisms. Hmmmm… (26m10s)

Tyler’s conversation that counted (39m50s)

 

Freddy vs Jason (1m13s)

 

Wendy

Just looked up your IMDb.

 

Tyler

How's that for you?

 

Wendy

Well, I'm just surprised that you are a good and all round sort of sane individual, having been on "Freddie versus Jason". I was like...."ahhh can't look!"

 

Tyler

So the funny thing is that almost everybody gravitates to that production. Like you were in Freddy versus Jason. I'm like, let me tell you....

 

Tyler

I've not seen it.

 

Tyler

...how very little I am in Freddy versus Jason. Like, blink and you miss me. And yet so many people actually know the scene when I explain it. And the people who have seen the movie, I know exactly who you are.....the counselor. I'm like, you don't know. And they're like, explaining the scene, and I'm like, oh, you do know. How do you know? I am so much nothing in that film. The funny thing is I got that role because I was actually doing photo double stand in and stunt work on that movie. And they needed somebody who could do this thing last minute.

 

Wendy

Put that broom down.

 

Tyler

Yeah, almost like that. So no word of a lie. For, like, three weeks prior to it, I was doing stand in work. And most stand in work, you just kind of sit in your chair off screen and just kind of wait and watch the actors do their thing. And I was doing almost nothing. I was literally sleeping on set.... "Annette wants to talk to you". That's extras casting, by the way. That's not main casting. That's extras casting. And I was like, oh. And I thought I was about to get fired because sleeping on set. Because she had come to set and Annette never comes to set. And I was like, oh, fuck. I'm like, "Hi". She's like, "hey". I'm like, "you're remarkably cheery. What's going on?" Because I'm still in a sleep haze. And she's like, "hey, do you want to do a speaking role?" I'm like, "I'm your extras ca.... Sure. I'm confused right now." And then she explained what was going on, and I was like, okay, sure. Let's do this thing. Why not? Two lines. That was all it was.

 

Wendy

See, I just thought I'll have a look and see because I know you'd say you'd done childhood acting, and I thought I'll go and have a look. And I've been playing around, and the podcast is on IMDb. So I thought, oh, I can credit him now. That's cool.

 

Tyler

Oh, that's awesome.

 

Wendy

Fast forward 20 years to the grown up job that you're doing now then Tyler is...

 

Tyler

I'm an adult, babysitter.

 

Wendy

You're the manny.

 

Tyler

Yeah.

 

What Tyler does now (4m10s)

 

Wendy

Just for the sake of the listeners, tell us what you do now.

 

Tyler

I wear many hats, primarily. I am now a best selling author and speaker coach. So I train people on how to give better presentations, feel more confident speaking to groups of people. And then I also run a safety consulting company. And you would think the two would be wildly disparate, that they just don't blend. But I actually got into the safety speaking or more specifically, the public speaker training from my safety consulting practice, because I found that the biggest hindrance to leadership being able to communicate their safety program and implement it. And in fact, the reason that my company is called Total Buyin is because the reason people couldn't get buyin was they had a very poor way of communicating and most people struggle with this public speaking persona. So my most popular training course was actually my "Power To Speak Naked" Course, which was rebranded to the "Power To Speak Naked", just to have a little bit more pop and sizzle!....

 

Wendy

Not in my mirror!

 

Tyler

Originally it was called Basic Instructional Technique because I liked the acronym. It was B.I.T. I'm going to give you a B.I.T.

 

Tyler

And the funny thing is, it was a way to trick people into learning how to public speak without thinking they were going to public speak. But I found that a lot of people felt ambushed by it because when they realised that two days was going to be public speaking and only public speaking, they were like, I don't public speak. And I'm like, Actually, you do. Yeah. The safety consultant kind of morphed into this public speaker training, which has really brought my life full circle. Right. You go from child actor to retiring after 20 years, because you get to do that. So I got to retire at 25, go back to school, get an engineering discipline, start my own business, watch that business crumble and fail, and then start to find my path in safety. And that was a weird detour too, becoming a safety professional after being a geomatics professional just because I had to take all this training to run my Geomatics company, to be compliant with the government. And all of those little twists and turns have brought me to this culmination of being able to, A, speak to executives on their level in a very sympathetic and understanding way, but also show them how they can communicate to everyone and vary their message and train them to be more effective communicators. It has just been bizarre and remarkably rewarding.

 

Wendy

I don't know about you, Tyler, but don't you find it fascinating that really, it boils down to we're all in sales, it doesn't matter what it is that you're talking about, you've just got to find that something that you are happy and passionate to communicate about.

 

Tyler

Yeah, no, we're all selling something. And I think that's the thing that I really was a light bulb moment for me when I was explaining safety, because I heard it all the time. Right. As a safety professional, your job is to sell safety. And I'm like, is it, though? And in my head, I was like, no, but really, it's about communicating. And then I'm like, well, sales is communication. And so, yes, we are all selling something, even if it's a belief in ourselves. Right? We need to communicate that vision of us so that other people can buy into that vision of us. I find it amazing that's kind of what the world boils down to is we're all selling something.

 

Everyone says you need to sell the benefits. It's actually more about selling the solution!

 

Wendy

And the first lesson we have to buy into... going to stay on brand... is the belief in ourselves, isn't it? That's the first lesson. And when it comes to anything at all, then it doesn't matter. I have this conversation with many a guest, is that we all think we're selling an outcome, yet in actual fact, what we want to feel is the transformation. So that's what we're buying into, isn't it? You can do this, but that's going to mean this as well. So often it's the byproducts that we want more than the thing.

 

Tyler

Yeah, it's funny, I was reading an article yesterday about good presentations and everybody thinks they need to sell the benefits and features and the reality is you need to sell the solution. And a lot of times that solution comes with identifying what the problem is to begin with and how for a lot of us, the problem is our own lack of belief in our own abilities. And so the first person that we need to sell to is ourselves. Like, what makes you capable of doing that? And I know for me, I've spoken on stage to tens of thousands of people. I've performed to auditoriums of thousands of people. I have in my band played to an outdoor venue that was almost hundreds of thousands of people. I think that when we played our venue there was 90,000 people. And like that everybody looks at me and goes, well, aren't you scared? I'm like, well, at that point, no, I wasn't scared of that. But let me tell you something that does terrify me. Sitting in an executive's office who earns millions of dollars every year and telling them that they're really bad at public speaking and helping them get there because... you want to talk about an inferiority complex, I'm like, who am I to be coaching this person? And they're looking at me going, how does he get up on stage every day and not feel terrified?

 

Wendy

They're disproportionate, aren't they, in terms of comparison?

 

Tyler

Exactly. And that's the thing. As soon as we recognise that we are all people and we all struggle with some of these self doubts, we all struggle with self doubt. It's just what are we doubting in that time? And for me, it's been remarkably freeing to be able to recognise that I have this skill set, this is the thing that I'm good at. And lucky for me, it only took 42 years to get to this point because there are people who don't know what they're good at for years and years and years and years. They spend all this time chasing the tiger tail and just doesn't they never catch it. And for me, I feel really blessed that I've been able to mash up all of my strengths and be able to compensate for my areas of improvement by outsourcing the people who do it way better than me. I'm not a good business man, which is hilarious because I technically own three companies now and will be starting a fourth one this year. Yeah, apparently I'm a masochist as well. But I recognise where I am, where my strengths are, and that is being able to give very clear direction, communicate an idea, and allow then people to go on their own. I'm very good at marshaling and connecting people, and then I have this really good skill set of being able to stand up on stage and just engage a crowd. And that has allowed me to do some really, really amazing things with my life and have just a really fun lifestyle, too. Like, I get to travel with my daughter. That's cool. That's really fun for me. And a high value on my hierarchy, too, is family. So to be able to bring her and have her a part of what I do, to be able to book vacations with the whole family around a speaking schedule and tour and make it a paid vacation... Like all those things are just really fun.

 

Tyler's favourite family trip (13m39s)

 

Wendy

Double barrel question. What would you say your favorite trip with her has been? And what would you say her favorite trip with you has been?

 

Tyler

You know, it's funny. You'd think it was going to Houston, but I actually think her favorite trip with me was when we went to the houseboat with my brother and sister in law. And the fact that I had the time to do that, that's the other thing too. My wife was in Ireland, and it was a long weekend here in Canada, except tember long weekend. I believe everybody else was going back to school, but Kenzie at that time would have been four, and so she didn't have school. And Jen and I... my wife and I had basically swapped Kenzie at the airport. I was coming back from a speaking engagement, and Jen was flying out to Ireland, and I think we didn't quite do the hand off at the airport, but it was pretty close. There's, like a day overlap. Hi, how are you? And my sister in law phoned me, and she said, hey, we've got the boat for the weekend, actually for the week. Did you want to join us? And I had nothing on the go. And so I looked at Kenzie, I'm like, do you want to go hang out at the lake? She's like, sure. And we packed up all the floaty stuff, and we went out to the house boat, and nobody else could make it because everybody else had things that were starting because it was the end of September. And so we basically toured around with Captain Jim and found a private beach and docked the boat and floated around the lake for four or five days. And Kenzie had an absolute blast. Like, she was uncovering rocks. She was going for hikes, she was swimming, and the houseboat had a water slide off the back of it. She's terrified to go off the water slide until Daddy took her the one time, and then she was still terrified to go off it. But then she wanted to do it again. Just all the things she still talks about it to this day, to the point where we ended up going houseboating again with Jen the following year. And she's like, I thought this was going to be more fun. You made it sound like it was more fun. I was like, I don't know what to tell you, babe. This is basically what we did the last time. This is a lot of fun for us. She's like, nah, this is not my thing.

 

Wendy

But isn't it interesting? Because what Kenzie has done really, is she's overcome some fears as well. And she's done that with dad holding a hand.

 

Tyler

Yeah, well, she does that a lot, too. Unfortunately, my daughter is the child of a former child actor, and I know the industry inside and out. So when I saw my daughter for the first time, I'm like, oh, wow, you look like an alien. And then about a week later, she stopped looking like an alien. It was just absolutely adorable. And then, so my next thought was like, you need to be in film. And everything in me was like, but your daddy can't be a stage daddy. No. And so she was in her first commercial before she was a year old. The first time she was on film, she was eleven months old. And I think she got her first modeling gig. She was coming up 22 months. Like, she wasn't yet two. It's actually that photo, that modeling gig photo is the cover of my cell phone because I absolutely love it. They captured an innocence about my child that I can't even replicate or duplicate because I see the terror that she is when I try to put her to bed.

 

Wendy

You can't control what she dreams about either, Tyler.

 

Tyler

But I've watched her grow up in film and be able to communicate to me, too. Like, Covid was really hard on her because she really enjoyed auditions prior to Covid because it meant that she got to go and see other kids. And in the audition room, they always had toys and she got to meet people and be social. My daughter is very, very social. And then when she got to go into the casting session, daddy couldn't come. It was just her and the casting director. Daddy had to wait outside and then she got to go and she got to play. And then if she got the role, she got to go on set. And I could come with her, but she got to be on camera. And Daddy didn't, except for the couple of times where we've gotten to do things together, which has been super fun, too. And then when Covid came and we switched from casting in person to casting virtually and doing self tapes, she hated it because casting was no longer getting dressed up and getting pretty and memorizing lines in the car ride to the running, rehearsing lines in the car ride to the audition.

 

Wendy

It's all the anticipation, though, in the build up, the interaction of it all.

 

Tyler

Yes. Because now it was coming down into the basement and reading with Daddy again, and I'm so proud of my daughter, because about the fifth audition into it, she was like, I don't want to do this anymore. I'm like, Baby, you love being on set. She's like, yeah, but I need to be on set if it means I have to go down to the basement and audition. And I was like, you are so mature. And for five. I love you. I was so proud. But she's overcoming those fears and finding her voice, which I shouldn't be surprised, because I dedicated my book to her and said that very thing. I was like, May you always have the courage to find your voice and know that you will be heard. So if I'm going to say that in the book, if I'm going to put it in writing, I'm going to put it out the universe, obviously she's going to be able to do that.

 

Wendy

Well. I think it's fascinating that there are parents out there that do this, put on to their children, their dreams, that sort of didn't happen in one thing or another. And you're not describing a child who doesn't have a mind of her own, which is great.

 

Tyler

Yes.

 

Wendy

So have you got any plans to bring her on stage with you at a speaking gig? Do you think she would handle that?

 

Tyler

Would she handle it? Absolutely. Will I do it? If she wants to? Honestly, we do the things that she wants to do. If I was a stage dad, I'd be like, no, you've got to audition because this is paying for your education. Because that's how I paid for my education. You start acting at six years old and 75% of your earnings go into a trust that builds up quickly, especially if you have good financial management with it. Was I sad a little bit when she stopped wanting to do it? Yeah, I was, because I see how much she enjoys it and I was sad that it was ruined for her but, you know, she also asked me a couple of weeks ago, she's like, Daddy, over the summer, can I start auditioning again? Sure. You don't have school. If that's what you want to do, we'll do it.

 

Wendy

It's a double edged sword, isn't it, Tyler? Because she's clearly... there are two sides to this. She's missed the auditioning, but she's also missed her thing with Daddy. She's got to be an element of that as well.

 

Tyler

Yeah, I think that has a bit to it, too. And so to your original question, would I bring her on stage? Absolutely. Because she loves that environment the same way that I do. But I would only bring her on, first of all, if it served a purpose, because that's the other thing, too, for me, I don't do anything on stage unless it serves a purpose, and more specifically, if it serves the audience. If it isn't going to be a benefit to my audience, I'm not going to bring my kid on stage just as a gimmick. Is she super cute? Yeah. Could I sell more programs if I put her up there? Absolutely I could, because you don't want to deny this child something. So buy Daddy's program and it would sell. But hey, I'm not going to exploit my daughter that way.

 

Wendy

No, but look, if I was in the audience and she came on stage and it was like the audience could ask her anything, I would just say, how much has Daddy paid you to do this? And I can just imagine her going, oh, no, I asked. Right? Now if you imagine that's the kind of endorsement, isn't it, that anybody would really want us as a parent or for any kind of fan. The fact that it's such a personal relationship just kind of strengthens that for me. So I just think there could be something in this. I can see this going somewhere.

 

Tyler

Yeah, I think you're right. It is a testament to her free will and the fact that my training works because she would want to do it as opposed to not want to do it. But I don't know what next month holds. I don't even know what the next hour holds. So I don't know what her wants and desires are going to be as she grows up and she kind of ebbs and flows out of a want for the spot. She's really, truly... they say that a child is a reflection of their parents, and she is. My wife and I are truly polar opposites. We are Ying and Yang. Right now. You want to talk the astrology, you're the ram. She's, you're the ox. Like, we are literally six years apart. She's not a tourist. She's... I believe a Pisces. So she's a water sign and I'm a fire sign. Right.

 

Wendy

She can put you out.

 

Tyler

Oh can she ever. But at the same time, we really complement each other because she's always allowing me and in fact, encouraging me to take the spotlight. And I'm always encouraging of her if she wants to step behind. She loves being a puppet master. First of all, she's a project manager. She loves to pull the strings from backstage. Right. Like, she is the ultimate wizard of Oz. Just don't look behind the curtain. Don't ask how the magic is done, but know that it's going to happen and it will work.

 

Wendy

We all need a bit more of that kind of lesson.

 

Tyler

Do not pay attention to the man behind the curtain. And she's brilliant. So I look at my daughter and when my daughter is being very like, you can see her thinking through a problem and she's very calculated with it and her daddy is not that way. I am one of those solve it through repeated trial and error. And Jen is very methodical in the let's not error, let's get it right the first time. So she thinks through the steps where I'm like, well, let's place the cog here and if it doesn't work, round peg, square hole. Doesn't work. Okay, round peg, triangle hole. No, still doesn't work. Oh, look, there's a round hole, let's stick it through there. I will try different options and Jen tries to do the right solution the first time. And it's interesting watching Kenzie blend that and find her own way, her own path and her own voice.

 

Wendy

There's nothing more magical is that being a parent and seeing what you influence every day, and don't realise what leaks.

 

Tyler

Yeah, it's amazing too. Yeah. Because she'll do things you're like, oh, I'm so proud of you. And then she'll do things and I'm like, oh, do not do that. And then I go, oh, but I would have done that. Even the way that my daughter... it's a sheer mirror, right? Children are mirrors of ourselves. And I watch her get frustrated right now and I hear me in her response where she'll go "ugh". It even sounds like me. And creepishly. She looks like me when she does it right? And when she gets really upset, deeply hurt by society, she looks like her mum. Like the way that you can see her process the hurt... "and why would that happen"? And I see her mum in her instantly and it's amazing how she has become this mirror to us and patterns our behavior. So there's things that she does and I'm like, oh, yeah, just like me. And then there's things that she does and I go, that's just like me.

 

Mannerisms. Hmmmm… (26m10s)

 

Wendy

Yeah. Mannerisms, it's a big topic. Mannerisms kind of bleeds out in body language, doesn't it? As well. When you're on stage and I've seen lots of different tips for what to do, people just don't know what to do with their hands, do they?

 

Tyler

Yeah, hands, feet. And here's the thing, because people will be told, keep still. And then you're unnaturally mannequin. And then people are like, don't pace, which really don't pace. But there are times where walking and movement is necessary and people are like, well, keep your hands still or use your hands, but don't use your hands too much, but find the thing. And then there is no magic bullet or one answer. What it is, is. And you and I have had this conversation offline. So let's say for your listeners online authenticity is synonymous with self awareness. If you want to be a truly authentic presenter, you need to know who you are at your core. I am a hand talker. I am a very large personality. I'm going to express myself with my hands, with my body, with my face. I'm expressive, but I'm not using one thing. Right. Like, what president was it? I think it was Bush senior had his thumb right. This was how he would deliver it.

 

Wendy

the hammer blow.

 

Tyler

The hammer blow, yeah. And everybody has that one thing. I think Bob Dole did it too. No, it was not the president. It was Bob Dole had this up. Bob Dole is what Bob Dole is going to do. And it never went away. This was the only gesture that happened from the podium. That's when it becomes a mockery, where, for me, I am going to wave my hands a lot. They're going to do this round, circular motion, but I'm also going to accentuate a thing, or I'm going to point to a thing, or I'm going to use a broad, wide gesture. When it's appropriate. I'm going to use my body to express itself. One of the challenges that I always give to any one of my clients is stand still for the first 60 seconds of your talk just to see how unnatural it feels. But at the same time that it makes you hyper aware of why you want to move, because sometimes you're moving to dissipate nervous energy, and that's pacing, that's nervous pacing, and that's distracting to an audience, and it's taking away from your message. But sometimes you need to move because your body needs to move. And if you suppress that instinct because somebody told you you need to be still, you need to keep your hands still, then you become this weird robotic mannequin mime where everything is frozen and still...

 

Tyler

And you're not on Zoom.

 

Wendy

And you're not on zoom. Yeah. There is time for movement, and it's finding and again, this is from my theatrical background when we would do blocking. There is time for movement, and there is time for stillness. Both have their ability to enhance the dialogue that is being delivered. Both have the ability to detract from the dialogue that is being delivered. And the key is learning when is the right time for both?

 

Wendy

So it's a lot like it depends.

 

Tyler

Like anything in life, right? When is it appropriate to do anything? Depends on the circumstances in which you're doing it.

 

Wendy

Yeah. I think this is why I like speaking to people like you, Tyler, that have got this fluid approach. There are frameworks that you can follow, and there are best practices that you can have key do's and don'ts. That isn't necessarily going to affect the it depends side of things. But it's going deeper into that intuition, isn't it, of your craft and what it is that you do. You can't even see my hands. I'm doing this going deeper into your craft, you know, needing bread.

 

Tyler

Yeah. But as you need the bread, using the hands to point the arrow and show the flow like it's an illustrative thing. We all are going to do it naturally. And the thing is, it's funny because if people are just listening to the audio, they're listening to making conversations count and all they have is the audio, they can still hear that movement.

 

Tyler

If you don't do it, your voice sounds different. You need that movement and it translates. If you were to do your podcast the next time, sitting on your hands and never move, people would be like, what is wrong with this episode? They wouldn't know, right? They couldn't see, but they would feel that it was just a little off. I was watching an unbelievable interview between two of my favorite comics, whitney Cummings and Taylor Tomlinson. And it was right at the beginning of the pandemic. It was like a few months in and somehow they were able to record live. They've done like an isolation thing. And in the conversation, Taylor was talking about how she had just recorded her first special and some of the things that she did to get with they were talking about insecurities and being a woman in comedy and some things that the men don't have to think about. And she was talking about just prior. She was promoting the special. She was on The Tonight Show and the makeup artist said, why don't you leave your hair down? You're so pretty. Why don't we just leave your hair down? And Taylor always ties her hair back because that's where she feels comfortable. And she does a lot of she's very animated when she tells her story. She reenacts a lot of the stuff and she bends over a lot. She takes physicalities. And when she's doing her storytelling, which is, by the way, fantastic thing to do when you want to tell a story. And she was talking about how she left her hair down and it threw her because comedy is very much like sports, where when you're at the top of your game, you're at the top of your game because you can do things in repetition. And her hair being loose through her off. And the Whitney Cummings was talking about how she had done a similar thing when she was filming her HBO special and left her hair down. And normally she keeps it back and she had, you know, lip gloss and her hair kept getting stuck in the lip gloss and it threw her. She's like, it's not that it was a bad set. It's that it wasn't the best set that it could be. And it's recognizing what are those things that are comfortable for us? What are those things that ground us? What are those things that illustrate the story so that we can tell the story better, so that we're not in our head, that we are connected with our body and subsequently connected with our audience? Because ultimately it's. About the audience and how do the distractions yeah. How do we give ourselves the best chance to connect with our audience, and that is to be out of our head. So I was fascinated by watching this interview at how much I related to it. Like, I have my pretalk routine that I have to do. There's the long version of it there's been nice to have, right? Like, I like it when I can walk through a venue and I can touch things. I like when I can meet with the audience prior to it and do a little bit of pre audience analysis. But my must have I have to have my five minutes backstage. I have to do my breathing exercises, I have to get my glass of water in before I go on stage. I absolutely, positively have to do my visualizations. If I don't do those things, I feel off each time. So it's finding those things that are going to serve you so that you can serve your audience.

 

Wendy

And a lot of people would call those rituals, but they're not are they about setting yourself up for what's to come?

 

Tyler

Yeah. And there is a form of ritual to it in that it's repeatable. So whether it's rich, do you call it ritual or whether you call it ritual?

 

Wendy

Oh, come on. You know, I've spoken to Brad.

 

Tyler

Yeah, yes, I do. But he had a point.

 

Wendy

But he does have a point, and he's made a very good point of using that terminology to serve people. And that's the point, isn't it? And it's clearly it serves you by doing things in a certain way and getting prepared. And just sort of going back to your point about the movement of things and an audio and the way that you can feel that. I can categorically tell you that after 2 million or something telephone calls, that if you're having a bad day and they say, Smile when you dial, and it does help, and it helps your posture and everything, right? But if you're having a terrible day, don't do it because people can hear that still, even when you've just made that extra effort gosh, yeah. Body language. Because that hearing tall that we have is so finely tuned when it's the only thing we have.

 

Tyler

Especially when it's the only thing we have. You know, you look at anybody who has any form of sensory deprivation, and then you have those heightened senses when you can only rely on the audio. It's amazing the cues that you can pick up on. And as you said, our brain is finely tuned to it. You know when somebody is smiling on the phone, you know when they're having a bad day. And it goes the other way, too. I've talked to people about this with energy work. We know when there's been a fight in a room, even if we've never witnessed the fight, you've walked into that room and people were like and then you get that link. You're like, oh, what is with that? And you're like and you become hyper sensitive and aware of you're walking on eggshells a little bit, because what did I just walk into? You didn't witness a fight. There was nothing you didn't see. You don't know. But you know that something went on. And we as human beings have a far better connection with each other than I think we give ourselves credit for.

 

Wendy

It's that invisible signature, isn't it, that is left behind, which is quite something.

 

Tyler

Well, and not only that's left behind, but that leads in front, right? Like, I have a magnetic field that travels around me, and that's leading my actions, and it's being left behind. And we literally do humans are basically big batteries. We have electromagnetic pulses running through us. That's how our body actually stays alive. When those electrical pulses stop, so does everything else, because the electrical pulses are what runs your brain in your heart. So when the electricity in your body stops, when your battery gets drained, that's when the body stops working. And anybody who's done any kind of 10th grade physics knows that if you run an electrical current through something, there is an electromagnetic wave that comes from that. That's how half of modern science measures. The body is through EKGs and your Cat scans and all the rest of it. All they're looking at is electrical pulses through your various organs. And if you have this electrical field around you, it's just a magnetic field, but like anything, you have electrons then that are moving through the air in front of you, and you have electrons that are moving through the air behind you. And you are literally affecting your environment beyond your actual physicality. And what you do with that and the energy that you're putting out, because you're literally putting out energy, is what is going to be felt. And so you got to remember, you are leading with energy just as much as you're leaving energy behind.

 

Wendy

That's deep. And it warrants part two.

 

Tyler

Let's do part two. Wendy.

 

Wendy

Let's do part two. And it also leads me into let's keep these listeners awake as well. Let's fire back up those neurons.

 

Tyler

Let's get those synapses firing, folks. Come on. Let's make this conversation count.

 

Wendy

I want to know the conversation that counted for you, Tyler.

 

Tyler

I've had so many, but when you said it, the first one that popped to mind was the conversation I had with my doctor, mentor and father figure growing up, Dr. Bob Corbett. I had a medical incident when I was 17 that left the left side of my body paralyzed. And I distinctly remember about a month and a half afterwards being in his office crying because my face didn't work, my body didn't work. My acting career was over, and being so frustrated with Western medicine. Here we are in the 21st century, and they can't diagnose what happened to me. Was it a stroke? Was it a bell's policy? Was it a mini stroke? Why did somebody say I had oh... I can't even remember. It just seemed so bizarre and it didn't even sound like a thing that could happen. A full body. I don't even remember. Anyway. Nobody could tell me what it was. And Bob sat me down. He said, Think of the blessing that is. I said, how is not knowing what the hell happened to me a blessing, sir? And he went, if you had a diagnosis, there would be one course of treatment which may or may not work. You had a stroke. There's nothing we can do. But we don't know what you had. So now we have the freedom to try anything. And if you can try, anything could work. In fact, everything could work. So let's start trying things and see what works. And then he quoted Edison. Edison didn't find a thousand ways not to make a light bulb right until he found the one that did. Bob has been a steady oarsman for me in my life, and what I appreciate the most about him, he really is an oarsman. He allows me to captain my ship. What's the course that we want to set, Captain? But he will be steady at the hand. If I tell him where due west. He will say, Very well, due west. He'll look at me and he says, you understand that looks like it could very possibly be bad weather. I'll say, yes. He goes, okay, let's weather this storm, then. We'll batten down the hatches. And I will keep this boat due west. And I have always been in great admiration of him and I've tried to pattern and emulate him as best I can in that he was one of the first people to teach me to like, I don't believe in finding the positive in life.

 

Wendy

Is that if it's just never big enough?

 

Tyler

It's not even that. What it is, is that my father passed away at six. I don't think that was a positive. I'm not going to be like, hey, dad died. Good for that. No, there's not a positive. But what I do look for is the grace in situations. There is grace in everything. My father passing away created an opportunity for me to have multiple father figures in my life, at least ten, Bob being one of them. My medical incident gave me a chance to reframe and refocus what was important to me. Really crystallize friendships, because I had incredible friend support when that happened. And in high school, that's rare too, right? I was a freak. I had a face that didn't work. The worst that my friends did was they'd make me laugh because I made this sound because I couldn't close my mouth. And it was comical. I don't blame them. It was irritating sometimes, but that was the worst that I got. How dare my friends try to make me laugh in a time of great tragedy for me.

 

Wendy

That's what friends do.

 

Tyler

That is what friends do. I have always looked for the grace and a lot of that came from the lessons that I learned from Bob and continually learned from Bob. He's struggling currently medically, and I'm watching what he's going through and again, how he's handling it with grace because it's got to be so frustrating for him and to witness his partial acceptance, but also pushing of experimentation, like, what is the solution? I think that's the thing that I like the most about him too. And one of the things that I learned is there's a problem? What is the solution and how can I be proactive with it? And that first conversation, 17 years old in his office, isn't this a gift? And having him look at now you have multiple solutions instead of one has influenced me for the rest of my life.

 

Wendy

What did work?

 

Tyler

I don't know which one. It was the kitchen sink. It was the kitchen sink that did it.

 

Wendy

Good.

 

Tyler

Bob is a doctor of chiropractic. His wife Joanne is a doctor of chiropractic who is a holistic practitioner. She's also an acupuncturist. So like with Jo, I was doing laser acupuncture, chiropractic and Eastern herbs and medicines. With Bob. I was doing chiropractic. They recommended me to an incredible physiotherapist. So I was doing physio. I was also taking modern medications to encourage synaptic regrowth and get neurons firing again, I did so much, and for a year I was scanned, prodded, poked and all kinds of weird stuff. And I don't know what worked, but it all kind of blended together. And did my face works now? My body works now.

 

Wendy

You've got quite a fine face, I have to say.

 

Tyler

Why, thank you, Wendy.

 

Wendy

When you revealed how old you were, I was like, what?

 

Tyler

I drink a lot of water and I moisturize. And I have a six year old daughter who keeps me spry and youthful. And I play hockey three times a week as a goaltender, so I'm never off the ice. So I get in my physical workouts and it keeps my mind sharp, I think. I hope.

 

Wendy

But they do say, don't they, that your physical health has a really big impact on everything else. So clearly it's working for you. Well, I'm just glad for Dr. Bob and it's just so heartwarming that you're still in touch with him all these years later. I don't know anybody that has got a doctor that stuck around that long.

 

Tyler

Well, it's funny because, again, I've been in touch with a lot of these gentlemen who helped guide me in my early years. Not as often as I'd like to, but I still talked to my physician, Dr. Spackman. I played in a band with his son for a couple of years, Dr. Bob and I.. I took him when I was made master of my lodge. Bob, he was the first person I reached out to and asked him to be at the ceremony. He influenced my life so much that not only do I feel the need to pay it forward, because a lot of the lessons that I teach from stage are things that I've learned from him, but I also feel an obligation to pay back. Like, I wouldn't have the life that I have. He was the first one to introduce me to self development. He bought me a ticket to Dr. John Demartini's breakthrough experience, and I didn't understand how profound that would be until later. And I didn't fully appreciate what kind of a gift that was until later in life. But that's the kind of man that he was. He was like, this is the thing I'm going to invest in you. This is a thing that was important for me, that I think will be important for you, and that's put me on a path. Right. I wouldn't have had the opportunity to speak on Tony Robin stage in Dallas if it were not for that seed that was planted over 20 years ago. And we never know.

 

Wendy

You took the words right out of my mouth.

 

Tyler

Trained public speaker here.

 

Wendy

(Laughs)

 

 

 

 

Want to listen to the audio version? In a place with limited downloads?

Click here to listen to a lower bandwidth version of the full episode:

Tyler Foley – lower bandwidth version

TL;dr - want the episode summarised in one paragraph, and in your own language? Here is it.

ENGLISH: “The truth is, at the end of the day, you can’t make anyone else happy. You do not have that power. You can influence them, you can lead them, you can inspire them, you can discipline them, you can set boundaries with them. You can love them, but you can’t make them happy. The only person that you can do that for is you.”

ARABIC:

الحقيقة هي أنه في نهاية المطاف لا يمكنك إسعاد أي شخص آخر. ليس لديك هذه القوة. يمكنك التأثير عليهم ، يمكنك قيادتهم ، يمكنك إلهامهم ، يمكنك ضبطهم ، يمكنك وضع حدود معهم. يمكنك أن تحبهم ، لكن لا يمكنك أن تجعلهم سعداء. الشخص الوحيد الذي يمكنك القيام بذلك من أجله هو أنت.
 

SPANISH: La verdad es que, al final del día, no puedes hacer feliz a nadie más.

Tú no tienes ese poder.

Puedes influir en ellos, puedes guiarlos, puedes inspirarlos, puedes disciplinarlos, puedes establecer límites con ellos. Puedes amarlos, pero no puedes hacerlos felices.

La única persona por la que puedes hacer eso eres tú.

 

FRENCH: La vérité est qu’en fin de compte, vous ne pouvez rendre personne d’autre heureux. Vous n’avez pas ce pouvoir. Vous pouvez les influencer, vous pouvez les diriger, vous pouvez les inspirer, vous pouvez les discipliner, vous pouvez établir des limites avec eux. Vous pouvez les aimer, mais vous ne pouvez pas les rendre heureux. La seule personne pour qui tu peux faire ça, c’est toi.

GERMAN: Die Wahrheit ist, am Ende des Tages kannst du niemanden glücklich machen. Du hast diese Kraft nicht. Du kannst sie beeinflussen, du kannst sie führen, du kannst sie inspirieren, du kannst sie disziplinieren, du kannst ihnen Grenzen setzen. Du kannst sie lieben, aber du kannst sie nicht glücklich machen. Die einzige Person, für die du das tun kannst, bist du.

 

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James Daniel Copywriter

Episode 8 – James Daniel

James Daniel – Copywriter
Making Conversations about Copywriting Count
Joining us in this episode is copywriter James Daniel.
He describes himself as ‘That old guy who writes copy – you know, the beardy one with glasses.’
We should point out there could be other old guys with beards and glasses out there!
It’s easy to like James’ style of writing because he’s a conversationalist who realizes that people don’t speak geek or tech.

Henny Maltby Digital marketing agency

Episode 9 – Henny Maltby

Henny Maltby – Digital Marketing Agency, Pink Elephant Media. Making Conversations about Digital Marketing Count. When the Pandemic hit in early 2020, Henny Maltby turned to her husband as they both realised their business was going to change forever. Offering online marketing to large corporate businesses who cut budgets left a hole to fill. By opening the conversation up with local businesses, it was obvious what the next chapter would be for them at Pink Elephant Media…

Kim Walsh Phillips

Episode 10 – Kim Walsh Phillips

Kim Walsh Phillips owns Powerful Professionals, a business that helps empower entrepreneurs to turn clicks into cash and identifying the superpowers in others so they can fly high. Kim is an expert in social selling strategy.

Amelia Thorpe Wellbeing coach

Episode 11 – Amelia Thorpe

Amelia Thorpe – Mental Health Wellbeing Coach. Making Conversations about Mental Wealth Count. Meet Amelia Thorpe, founder of Wellbeing 360, who talks to Wendy about how important it is to give equal priority to our mental and physical health. Listening to Amelia’s story will bring a beacon of hope that we can all take charge of our own conversations which will give us back the control that slips sometimes when times are tough. Amelia is a wellbeing counsellor.

John Attridge capacity business

Episode 12 – John Attridge

John Attridge – Guiding Businesses to Reach their Full Potential by Tapping into Spare Capacity

Making Conversations about Capacity Count. John Attridge, owner of BBX turns spare capacity into value for many businesses. When you listen to John you just know there is a bigger story to this guy as his accent gives it away!
John has successfully built a business network and community to help people fill spare capacity and exchange services. It is a brilliant concept and if you’ve not come across it before yet in touch with me and I’ll tell you more. Using the BBX community helped my own business through the lockdown and has provided such a lot of support and new relationships.

Clara Wilcox return to work coaching for parents

Episode 13 – Clara Wilcox

Clara Wilcox runs The Balance Collective, Specialising in Return to Work Coaching for Parents. Making Conversations about Returning to Work Count! This is a conversation that every Mum will resonate with, juggling home and work is not simply a balancing act but a superpower!

Clara recognized through her own personal journey that the right support for Mum’s returning to work was only available from the employer’s point of view. This causes a biased approach and is not always helpful in an emotive decision-making process.

dr ivan misner bni networking

Episode 14 – Dr Ivan Misner

In this episode, Ivan and Wendy explore how conversation is the foundation of all growth and learning. How times have changed, looking back and also predicting our future generations experiences, yet communication will still be the underpin even it how that looks has changed.

Janine Coombes marketing coach

Episode 15 – Janine Coombes

Google has recognised this lady as the #1 marketing coach and her video series mixes humour with key messages, it is the lovely Janine Coombes. Janine is a marketing coach for personal brands.
In this episode, Janine and Wendy share how using the right language influences the conversations we have and how it affects our results.

Lizzie Butler presentations coach

Episode 16 – Lizzie Butler

Making conversations about presentations count! Delighted to introduce Lizzie Butler, owner of LB Communications, who met Wendy at a local online networking event and immediately hit it off. Lizzie helps you to grow your business through personal development training and how to achieve brilliant communication.

Jem hills inspirational speaker

Episode 17 – Jem Hills

Making conversations about Bullying count. Jem Hills is an inspirational speaker, trainer & performance coach.
Talking to Wendy in this episode is ex-marine Jem Hills who you might find it hard to believe was affected by bullying and a lack of confidence. As a release Jem discovered Northern dancing and practiced as a bedroom activity that later led to an accidental release of freestyle dancing at a competition. The dancing-built resilience and the foundations for the training to complete the Mud Run and onto his Elite Special Forces career.

Peter howard graphic design

Episode 18 – Peter Howard

Peter Howard runs a design studio that is ranked in the top 100 in the country and was responsible for the WAG brand. Having known Peter and his team for many years, Wendy has heard lots of his stories but knew there would be one she had not heard before.

Taz Thornton & Asha Clearwater business coaches

Episode 19 – Taz Thornton & Asha Clearwater

Making conversations about partnerships count. In a Making Conversations Count first, we are joined by two dynamic guests in this episode. Both Taz & Asha provide business coach services in different areas. Joining Wendy chatting about all the elements that make up a great debate. You are not going to want to miss the observations with Taz Thornton and Asha Clearwater around questioning, opinions, debate and discernment that makes for wonderful colourful conversations.

Vicki Carroll O'Neill

Episode 20 – Vicki Carroll (formerly O’Neill)

Vicki works with entrepreneurs, small business owners and executive leaders who are stuck in their business and need someone as a partner to coach them to their next level of success. Vicki offers growth marketing consultant advice, strategy plans & also organises in-house marketing teams.

heidi medina business coach

Episode 21 – Heidi Medina

This episode contains one of our most important conversations, so we’re definitely going to make it count!
Wendy Harris brings Heidi Medina into the conversation today, who opens up the conversation about abuse she has encountered.
She’s a Linkedin expert and business coach who is the exact opposite of the classic ‘my way or the highway’.
Whether you meet Heidi online or in person she is the same.

Niraj Kapur online sales coach

Episode 22 – Niraj Kapur

In this episode, Wendy is joined by Online Sales Coach Niraj Kapur from “Everybody works in Sales” a business that helps companies with their sales processes.

Steve Judge paralympian motivational speaking

Episode 23 – Steve Judge

A life-changing accident that almost claimed a life but actually birthed a mindset shift.  Making conversations about speaking count!

Imagine losing your limbs in an accident.

That’s a real human test.

Most people would fall into one of two camps.

Feel the loss, and struggle to overcome it, before essentially accepting your ‘job lot’ and just becoming a bit angry.

Many would. And they’d be forgiven.

Then there are others, who would not let it defeat them, or define them.

Steve Judge is definitely in the latter of the two camps.

Nikolas Venios the ideas agency

Episode 24 – Nik Venios

We reflect on how this business man helped his poorly mother solve a household challenge which led to a career of making conversations about ideas and innovation count. We will all eventually lose our parents. Sadly, it’s a part of life. Not many of us have to suffer that loss at the tender age of just six. We couldn’t think of a nicer guy to help us with our goal of making conversations about ideas count. Truly, if anyone can hold a conversation about ideas, it’s Nik Venios of the Ideas Agency. Did you know that NASA has a genius test? During this episode, you’ll find out all about this, and the fascinating stats surrounding it.

Jonny cooper hates marketing

Episode 25 – Jonny Cooper

Most business owners hate marketing. That’s probably because they don’t understand it. Someone who does get marketing is Jonny Cooper, and even he can’t stand it! In fact, he despises it so much, he built a business around it. Welcome to Jonny Hates Marketing! This week we’re making conversations about messaging count. Messaging is so important to get correct. Your entire marketing voice depends on it. That’s why you need to listen very carefully to Jonny Cooper.

Wendy Harris telephone trainer how to sell over the phone

Episode 26 – Wendy Harris

Wendy Harris is an expert telemarketer, who has years worth of experience in cold-calling and doing it right. Now a podcast host, Wendy shares her story and how she became an advocate for making conversations count!

Will Polston Make it happen

Episode 27 – Will Polston

Making conversations about wealth….and Clubhouse….count! Paying it forward. Acting from a position of generosity and giving within the law of reciprocity. We’re talking to Will Polston.

Ray Blakney Live Lingua

Episode 28 – Ray Blakney

Making conversations about language count… Ray Blakney is the CEO And founder of online language school Live Lingua. Can you speak another language other than your native tongue? Wendy admitted to the “Making Conversations Count” team that she doesn’t, and we can’t help but feel she’s definitely not alone.

Many Ward write my book cuddle monster

Episode 29 – Mandy Ward

Mandy Ward is a book mentor, helping people to write their own books under the company ‘Write my book’. Mandy is also an author herself, including the popular children’s book ‘The Cuddle Monster’.

Sarah Townsend copywriter survival skills for freelancers

Episode 30 – Sarah Townsend

Sarah Townsend is a freelance copywriter and best-selling author of the book ‘survival skills for freelancers’. In this episode, we discuss the importance of conversations in the freelance world, and how things can lead to many opportunities…

Paul Furlong visual branding advertiser videographer

Episode 31 – Paul Furlong

Paul Furlong is part of Opus Media, producing TV advertising, videos, and photographs for businesses. He knows a thing or two about visual branding, and is considered a advertising guru!

Masami Sato founder B1G1

Episode 32 – Masami Sato

Masami Sato set up the B1G1 initiative. Helping businesses to do good by giving back. When was the last time you gave, freely Not for tax reasons. And not because you felt awkward at a raffle. We could all always do more.

Ann Hobbs Forward thinking publishing

Episode 33 – Ann Hobbs

Ann Hobbs helps people to self-publish their books with Forward Thinking Publishing. She is also a coach and author of her book ‘Kick ass your life’, helping people to push through adversity.

Kim-Adele Platts Career development coach

Episode 34 – Kim-Adele Platts

Kim-Adele Platts, Career Development Coach. Making Conversations about Leadership Count! If you don’t believe in yourself how do you expect others to? This was a question and topic that surfaced during this powerful and insightful conversation with Kim-Adele Platts.

Marina Hauer branding specialist for coaches

Episode 35 – Marina Hauer

Marina Hauer is a branding specialist for independent coaches. Are you using three different brand ‘voices’ in your marketing efforts? We’re making conversations about branding count!

David Smith MBE paralympian

Episode 36 – David Smith

David Smith MBE is a Paralympian in the sport Boccia. Do you know what Boccia is? David tells you in this episode all about the most inclusive Paralympian sport that helps people with their independence.

Graham Nash accountant

Episode 37 – Graham Nash

Graham Nash, BusinessWise Accountants, has worked in many fields over the years and the one common denominator has been helping business turnaround.

Ian Genius sales coach

Episode 38 – Ian Genius

Ian Genius is the sales coach to help you gain confidence in sales. His Ingenious technique helps clients see the value of your best package to COMMAND a higher price.

Jennie Erikson voice over artist

Episode 39 – Jennie Eriksen

Jennie Eriksen is a voice over artist, her company name is Lovely Voice. She helps her intended listener to learn by being able to bring characters to life.

Stella Da Silva employability trainer

Episode 40 – Stella Da Silva

Stella Da Silva talks about vocations in this episode, as a specialist employability trainer she shares her insider knowledge.
What skills do you need to be employable?

Hypnotist Jonathan Chase

Episode 41 – Jonathan Chase

Look into my eyes! You will feel very sleepy! You guessed it, we’re having one of our many conversations that count with hypnosis star Jonathan Chase.

Brynne Tillman social sales link

Episode 42 – Brynne Tillman

Brynne Tillman is a social selling expert. Her company ‘Social Sales Link’ teaches the importance of connection for selling on LinkedIn and other platforms.

Ruth Driscoll

Episode 43 – Ruth Driscoll

Ruth Driscoll supports people through toxic relationships. Her company the ‘life liberator’ takes her personal experiences to help others.

Rob Begg mindset coach

Episode 44 – Rob Begg

Rob Begg is a results based mindset coach to business leaders & teams. In this episode, he talks about your ego and self-limiting beliefs many of us hold.

Dan Knowlton video advertising

Episode 45 – Dan Knowlton

Dan Knowlton and his brother Lloyd run Knowlton – a social media and video advertising company who create unique, funny content to stop the scroll.

Sudhir Kumar

Episode 46 – Sudhir Kumar

Sudhir Kumar is an expert in social selling to grow your business, he’s written a book ‘Being Human: Marketing & Social Selling in a Digital World’.

Episode 47 – Ann Page

Ann Page is a lawyer who helps other lawyers with her courses. She teaches valuable business skills and teaches the importance of avoiding jargon.

Joe Chatham networking

Episode 48 – Joe Chatham

Joe Chatham set up USA 500. It’s an exclusive member-based organization focusing on sharing his expertise in marketing relationships and networking.

Larry Long Jnr

Episode 49 – Larry Long Jnr

Larry Long Jnr is a sales coach that helps give people, teams, and organizations the motivation to go from good to great.

pete cann laughter man

Episode 50 – Pete Cann

Larry Long Jnr is a sales coach that helps give people, teams, and organizations the motivation to go from good to great.

Hear what people are saying about the show

I love this podcast. The guests you have on all bring something new to the conversation and definitely thought-provoking.

Sometimes this means I change something I do, or something I would say, and other times it’s a real opportunity for reflection.

Thanks for sharing your guests with us Wendy, the podcasts are brilliant.

Paula Senior

I always enjoy listening to Wendy’s Making Conversations Count podcast and admire her talent for drawing out people’s stories and getting to the heart of things for finding out what makes them tick.

We all have pivotal moments and Wendy manages to find the right parts, showcasing the reasons why someone is who they are.

It’s those details that we connect to and come to more understanding of why people do what they do.

Heidi Medina

Love this podcast series. It’s a great idea to have a theme of ‘pivotal conversations’ and the variety of guests from massively different backgrounds keeps it fresh and interesting.

Wendy is a natural host and makes people feel at ease to share their stories.

Andrew Deighton

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